Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Bloodknight

Online | Search for a member

Bloodknight

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 13082
  • Number of comments : 271
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Bloodknight : Ask...

Bloodknight's page activity

Visits<b>Journiexo</b> - yesterday at 7:44pm<b>jaydoug92</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 4:32pm<b>shaar</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 12:00am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 4:13pm<b>tagallopes</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 9:23pm<b>luc887</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 1:32pm<b>seldom66</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 1:21am<b>Fr0gs</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 10:28pm<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 4:01am<b>abv96</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 8:46pm<b>trell000</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 4:40am<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 3:28am<b>ksadhera</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 4:40am<b>xxnick2dmaxx</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 5:12am<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 1:08am<b>raz_berri93</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 10:56pm<b>alexmisty88</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 11:13am<b>poulkrebs</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 1:04am

Bloodknight's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Bloodknight's badges

Bloodknight's favorite FMLs

Today, my grocery shopping consisted of Poptarts, SpaghettiOs, Lucky Charms, Popsicles, Easy Mac, and Twinkies. I'm a 25-year-old woman with no kids. FML

#20947507
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33190) - you deserved it (20229)

On 11/06/2013 at 8:04am - misc - by pathetic (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, at work, I had to explain to my co-manager at work what a period was, after he refused to let an employee go change her tampon. Afterwards, he panicked, saying he thought women made that up so they didn't have to have sex, before trying to send her to the hospital and fainting. We're 24. FML

#20944786
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62002) - you deserved it (4041)

On 11/04/2013 at 12:45am - intimacy - by TheTruthofWomen (woman) - United States

Today, my fiancée of 2 years and mother of my son, who is also pregnant with our second son, commented on how lucky two friends getting married were to have found each other. I said that we're just as lucky. She responded, "No. They actually love each other." FML

#20936067
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45297) - you deserved it (4119)

On 10/27/2013 at 8:41pm - love - by failure (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, the tickets I bought for my favorite band's concert arrived in the mail. The concert was last night. FML

#20935170
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45847) - you deserved it (4136)

On 10/27/2013 at 12:11am - misc - by MsConfusedd (woman) - United States

Today, someone popped my birthday balloon at school. Her reasoning was that she "didn't want people to know we have the same birthday." Who popped it? My identical twin sister. FML

#20934033
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47633) - you deserved it (3241)

On 10/25/2013 at 11:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I went on a first date. He left me standing at a bus stop while he took a dump in some bushes. FML

#20922179
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47223) - you deserved it (4284)

On 10/15/2013 at 11:10pm - love - by highlydisgusted - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend at a dinner with our two families. Not only did she flatly reject me, my dad said, "Good call. He's not ready." FML

#20921216
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46500) - you deserved it (6107)

On 10/15/2013 at 2:49am - love - by notready (man) - Australia

Today, while despairing over having been rejected for my dream job, I received an email asking me to come back in for another interview. Then they called me to say they accidentally sent the email to all the applicants, and that they definitely aren't interested. FML

#20915163
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41448) - you deserved it (2735)

On 10/10/2013 at 1:59pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was talking dirty to my long-distance lover while touching myself, when a cockroach fell from my ceiling and landed on the hand I was molesting myself with. FML

#20915065
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48130) - you deserved it (16222)

On 10/10/2013 at 11:40am - intimacy - by DisgustinglyFrustrated - Argentina (Santa Fe)

Today, my boyfriend accused me of cheating because according to him, our child does not have his hair color, eye color, or other facial features. Our son is five days old, bald and hasn't opened his eyes much. The closest thing I can probably compare him to is an old, wrinkly potato. FML

#20912171
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53555) - you deserved it (4222)

On 10/08/2013 at 5:55am - kids - by thisguy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a text asking him to come over a little later and have some "fun" with me. He texted back, "WTF babe? Breaking Bad's on tonight. You got a dildo, fucking use it." FML

#20900698
292 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61203) - you deserved it (25705)

On 09/29/2013 at 3:46pm - intimacy - by -___- (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I broke up with my abusive girlfriend. She responded by breaking into my place and stabbing my hamster with a fork. FML

#20898181
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66749) - you deserved it (4060)

On 09/27/2013 at 4:33pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went in the diner I always pass by and ordered a sandwich. When I asked how much it was, the waitress replied, "Don't worry, honey. We give free meals to the homeless on Thursdays." I was too ashamed to deny it, so I just said thank you and left. FML

#20896706
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42439) - you deserved it (5584)

On 09/26/2013 at 11:20am - misc - by horriblefashionsense (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, it's my wedding day. Almost a year ago I was in a terrible car accident that nearly left me paralyzed, but I worked my ass off to be able to walk down the aisle. After a lot of blood, sweat, and tears I made it to the big day... and woke up with food poisoning. FML

#20883990
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63104) - you deserved it (2828)

On 09/16/2013 at 5:11pm - health - by somethingblue - United States (Massachusetts)



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: