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Today, after telling me his other girlfriend is pregnant, my boyfriend said we should stay together so I could help out with the baby. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40532) - you deserved it (3181)
On 09/15/2010 at 2:02pm - love - by Username - Sent from mobile version
Today, I realized the guy I like is not deaf. This would normally be good news. However, for the past two weeks I assumed he was deaf after seeing him use sign language. I've been openly talking about him within earshot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5838) - you deserved it (30898)
On 09/14/2010 at 4:00pm - love - by Jackie - United States (California)
Today, at dinner, my grandmother informed us that my cousin's newborn baby has been having seizures. My verbal filter did not switch on in time and I replied, "It's not a seizure if you're shaking it." FML
I agree, your life sucks (6533) - you deserved it (27822)
On 09/09/2010 at 4:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I discovered that my husband is a tad paranoid after finding out that our cat has worms. He and I were in the middle of sharing a romantic shower following something of a dry spell when he bent over, spread his cheeks apart and asked, in earnest, "is there a worm sticking out of my ass?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (26752) - you deserved it (2351)
On 09/06/2010 at 12:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, my boyfriend was talking with his friends about how long girls take to get ready (hair, make-up, etc.). I said, "I never spend a long time getting ready..." He then looked at me and said, "maybe you should." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23230) - you deserved it (5321)
On 08/29/2010 at 10:14am - love - by ILoveFML - United States (New York)
Today, I made a mistake at work that got 7 people fired. I'm scared to leave the office because they're all outside. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11741) - you deserved it (47802)
On 08/25/2010 at 3:13pm - work - by Joel - United States (California)
Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35561) - you deserved it (9660)
On 08/22/2010 at 2:58am - kids - by Bailey - United States (Nebraska)
Today, one of my cousins offered to sell me his mac for a low price. When I got it, I realized it was an old toshiba painted white with an apple sticker on it. My cousin still insists it's a mac. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13227) - you deserved it (23296)
On 08/18/2010 at 8:53pm - misc - by roflcopter (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my boyfriend forgot our anniversary. But it's okay; I wasn't expecting anything after he forgot my birthday, Valentine's Day, and my name. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31491) - you deserved it (20132)
On 08/09/2010 at 10:38am - love - by Forgotten (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, while on my run, I saw a middle-aged man sleeping near a business condo. I approached him and asked if he was "ok." He grabbed my leg, held onto it with a death-grip, and moped about how horrible his life was - for ten minutes. At least the weather was nice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19722) - you deserved it (6630)
On 07/28/2010 at 11:00pm - misc - by runandmope (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was fooling around on the trampoline with this guy, when a bounce caused us to bang our heads together, knocking me out cold. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17886) - you deserved it (9081)
On 07/27/2010 at 1:08pm - intimacy - by aero00 (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, my girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me because she said I was more of a woman than she was. I yelled out, "I HATE YOU!" and started to cry. She then took a tampon out of her purse, handed it to me, laughed, and walked away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13545) - you deserved it (52554)
On 07/24/2010 at 6:53am - misc - by GirlishMan1883897 (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my mother told me that the carbon-monoxide alarm went off last night, but since she didn't smell any gas, she decided to just remove the batteries and go back to bed. I had to explain to her that you can't smell carbon monoxide, and that we could have died in our sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34695) - you deserved it (1534)
On 02/06/2010 at 1:22pm - misc - by Kelso (woman) - United States
Today, I was anxiously waiting for the guy I had a crush on to pick me up for our first date. He shows up with his son, whom I never knew about, and takes us to Chuck E. Cheese. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19537) - you deserved it (3566)
On 02/05/2010 at 4:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I got married. My mother told me to stop being difficult, because she was the mother of the bride, and it was her day to shine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29898) - you deserved it (1906)
On 02/03/2010 at 12:58pm - love - by bluebride (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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