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Beavers18

Offline (the 07/14/2015 at 5:44am) | Search for a member

Beavers18

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 3 March 1984 (31 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2846
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Beavers18's page activity

Visits<b>marleytooyou</b> - the 03/28/2010 at 6:26pm

Beavers18's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of Beavers18's badges

Beavers18's favorite FMLs

Today, I took a shower with my boyfriend. I tried to be adventurous and went to give him a blowjob, only to end up slipping and head-butting him in the balls. FML

#21406233
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32685) - you deserved it (5368)

On 05/07/2015 at 2:00pm - intimacy - by pleasedie - United States (Florida)

Today, I complimented a guy on his beard. His response? "Thanks. Wanna sit on it?" FML

Today, I went on Facebook. The third post down was a selfie of my mom looking sad, with the caption, "God I need a good dicking." FML

#21218442
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51526) - you deserved it (11867)

On 07/23/2014 at 4:00pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband was getting undressed. I told my 2-year-old daughter not to go in our bedroom because he was undressing in there. I turned my back and she instantly ran off to my bedroom. I heard her shout "I can see daddy's tail!" Now, she points to everyone's crotch and shouts "TAIL!" FML

#20943580
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51969) - you deserved it (6655)

On 11/03/2013 at 9:22am - kids - by KittyKat (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, I changed my relationship status on Facebook from "in a relationship" to "single." I forgot to take my phone to work, and when I got back, I saw someone had replied, "What happened?" Someone else commented, "He broke his hand." My ex and a bunch of other "friends" liked it. FML

#18935378
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22105) - you deserved it (4447)

On 01/28/2012 at 4:52pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my dad asked me if I could convince my mother to get a Brazillian wax. If that's not bad enough, my mother heard and yelled from the other room, "I like my furball." FML

#9041294
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34922) - you deserved it (2514)

On 03/13/2010 at 5:35am - intimacy - by Grossed Out - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I finally felt ready to take my bra off during sex. My breasts had "deflated" somewhat due to weight loss and I was really self-conscious about them, but my boyfriend insisted I was hot no matter what. When the bra came off, the dick got soft. FML

#8793926
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32195) - you deserved it (3699)

On 03/03/2010 at 4:24am - intimacy - by victoriassecret - United States

Today, I learnt that if you accidentally sit on a hamster, instead of dying, it bites your testicles. FML

#8742333
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9968) - you deserved it (38661)

On 03/01/2010 at 4:13am - animals - by ItHurtsLIkeHell (man) - Malaysia (Pulau Pinang)

Today, after finalizing my divorce, I decided to go out with a guy I had been ogling for months, after much anticipation and a few rounds of drinks at the bar, I was ready to roll. Much to my disappointment, his penis was so small the condom wouldn't stay on. FML

#8741180
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23480) - you deserved it (7576)

On 03/01/2010 at 2:30am - intimacy - by Lovejunkie (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, at my volleyball tournament I was extremely pumped to start playing so I went to take my sweats off and everybody began to stare at me then I looked down to come to realize I had no spandex on, just a thong. FML

#8698914
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10139) - you deserved it (28704)

On 02/27/2010 at 8:11pm - misc - by volleyballgirl - United States

Today, I realized explosive diarrhea can happen, and at the most inopportune times, such as on the day of MY wedding. At the alter while my husband said his vows. FML

#8658648
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56161) - you deserved it (2972)

On 02/26/2010 at 5:23am - love - by pain (woman) - Japan

Today, I was finally hooking up with a girl I was after for a long time.Things got really hot and heavy but she stopped and looked at me weird. She said, "I can't do it, you're really wet. It looks like chicken fat." FML

#8658617
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19520) - you deserved it (3642)

On 02/26/2010 at 5:21am - intimacy - by humiliated - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, as I was in the middle of giving my boyfriend head, he looked at me and said "Eat that cockmeat sandwich." He seriously thought it was a turn on. FML

#8612395
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24899) - you deserved it (4317)

On 02/24/2010 at 10:06am - intimacy - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I drunkenly hooked up with my friend's cousin. After trying to stick his finger up my butt, he blacked out on top of me with his penis still hard inside me. I tried yelling his name and pushing him off, with no success. I ended up having to call my friend to help me. FML

Today, I tried to see if you can kick yourself in the nuts. You can. FML

#8581671
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5997) - you deserved it (63561)

On 02/23/2010 at 4:28am - misc - by nutcracker (man) - Slovenia (Bohinj)



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