Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

BeautifulLiesx

Offline (40 minutes ago) | Search for a member

BeautifulLiesx

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 1419
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 24 posted

About BeautifulLiesx : Band

BeautifulLiesx's page activity

Visits<b>Edogg215</b> - 2 hours ago<b>diesel_power</b> - 6 hours ago<b>nightfire2258</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 11:56pm<b>mixinitup</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 10:42pm<b>medic8</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 3:07pm<b>olivetree172</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 9:58pm<b>ilovecuddling</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 12:22pm<b>Booda_Shun</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 2:07am<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 1:42pm<b>Elgaard</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 2:34am<b>buckeye1</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 6:14pm<b>2i1337i2iscore</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 6:11pm<b>aa1717</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 10:48pm<b>jgwyh</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 4:00am<b>SevanaRatchet</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 3:58pm<b>RandomPrius</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 11:51pm<b>tifdunc</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 11:31pm<b>raresc</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 2:34pm

BeautifulLiesx's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

42

You see, sonny boy, moderating FMLs is a bit like running a marathon.

See all of BeautifulLiesx's badges

BeautifulLiesx's favorite FMLs

Today, I left my dog in the car while I quickly ran into a store. I came out to a woman smashing at my window, screaming that it was too hot in the car for the dog and saying I was being inhumane. The car was still running and the air conditioning was on. FML

#20721457
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57363) - you deserved it (8228)

On 06/12/2013 at 12:47pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, after years of faking pleasure with my boyfriend, I visited the gynaecologist. As soon as she touched my privates I instinctively let out a fake moan. FML

#20720590
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34736) - you deserved it (71504)

On 06/11/2013 at 11:06pm - intimacy - by instinct (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was meeting my boyfriend's family for the first time. The minute I stepped in the door his mother hit me in the face and kicked me out because I was "the slut her husband cheated on her with." My older sister and I look much alike. Too much alike. FML

#20719355
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62238) - you deserved it (4171)

On 06/11/2013 at 11:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I took my pet rabbit to the vet because I had noticed his genitals looked swollen compared to my other rabbit's. It turns out he's just "gifted". The vet laughed at me. FML

#20719275
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43257) - you deserved it (6603)

On 06/11/2013 at 10:00am - animals - by Rjlup - United States (Colorado)

Today, my friend told me he had just robbed a bank and needed a place to hide. Thinking he was joking, I let him in so we could hang out. 15 minutes later, the cops storm into my apartment. Now I'm an accomplice in a crime I thought was a joke. FML

#20718656
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57635) - you deserved it (15912)

On 06/10/2013 at 11:23pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, in class, we were discussing stereotypes. We were asked about common ones about nearby cities. A guy said, "Well, they say Lumberton has the prettiest girls." My teacher asked if any of us were from Lumberton, so I raised my hand. The guy quickly said, "Nevermind." FML

#20717445
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54809) - you deserved it (5345)

On 06/10/2013 at 1:04pm - misc - by wellthanks (woman) - United States

Today, I was told by my grandfather that I was no longer allowed to visit him or to set foot in his house. Why? He found out I have been taking Japanese and German as electives in my degree, so I must be an 'enemy spy'. FML

#20716829
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46375) - you deserved it (4755)

On 06/10/2013 at 1:09am - work - by Frazz (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend and I watched the new movie "The Purge." After the movie, I jokingly asked him that if the U.S. had such a purge in real life, would he participate, and who would he kill first. Without missing a beat, he said, "you." FML

#20714140
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41048) - you deserved it (8062)

On 06/08/2013 at 7:43pm - misc - by purged (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my 21-year-old girlfriend finally got the courage to tell her mom that she wanted to move in with me. It turns out she was right to be afraid; during the talk, her mother yelled at us, calling her a slut and saying she was too young to be "shacking up with some guy." FML

#20714116
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41679) - you deserved it (5541)

On 06/08/2013 at 7:26pm - love - by MonsterInLaw (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I found out why my daughter eats so many sugary baked goods. According to her, when you bake things, all the sugar and calories are "released" and so you can't gain weight from it. It seems I raised a moron. FML

#20713749
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44257) - you deserved it (8696)

On 06/08/2013 at 3:01pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my sister and I were having a slumber party in my room since my parents left on a trip. They left my grandparents here to watch us. It was past bed time and we started hearing some strange noises through my floor. We thought it was the radio. Turns out my grandma is a screamer. FML

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML

#20711208
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55000) - you deserved it (64109)

On 06/07/2013 at 3:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I could no longer handle the drum music in the apartment below me so I went to kindly ask the little old lady to shut it off before she goes to bed. Her neighbor came out while I knocked to tell me she is out of town and the music is constant so her cats don't get lonely. FML

Today, my little sister was scared to sleep alone, so my parents made her sleep in bed with me. I barely slept, due to the utter terror of waking up to her chanting into my ear in a low whisper, "This is where you die, this is where you die..." FML

#20709788
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50736) - you deserved it (3465)

On 06/06/2013 at 2:47pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Isle of Man

Today, I got a promotion and transfer at work. My first responsibility is to fire my soon to be father in-law. FML

#20708889
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55979) - you deserved it (3026)

On 06/06/2013 at 1:08am - work - by hesgonnahateme - United States (Kentucky)



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: