BeachGirl27

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Offline (the 06/22/2016 at 12:54pm)

BeachGirl27

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Wollongong, Australia
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 16 November 1969 (46 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1852
  • Number of comments : 144
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 18 posted

About BeachGirl27 : I'd say I'm at the extreme end of "normal" and am complicated enough that noone understands me, even myself! According to my daughters their friends see me as cool even though I'm a self-confessed nerd. I am pretty non-judgmental and open-minded except about bad parenting and have a bizarre sense of humour. Yup, that about sums me up.

BeachGirl27's page activity

Visits<b>im_a_squid</b> - the 07/09/2016 at 10:15pm<b>FoxOne</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 2:09am<b>6pointOhhh</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 6:06pm<b>0mysteriousman0</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 3:28am<b>tranced_</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 12:13am<b>Evil20071</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 10:53pm<b>yungblkrich</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 9:06pm<b>mathsfreak</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 7:20pm<b>Kakaabeg</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 2:24pm<b>tipuda</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 10:50am<b>Tarlachia</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 7:07am<b>Laxinitup</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 6:00am<b>emmadedilemma</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 8:46am<b>WD_Stevens</b> - the 05/13/2016 at 2:09pm<b>stereomommy</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 8:06am<b>Rais</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 3:07am<b>Tenker</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 12:11am<b>joco4</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 4:34am

Fucked!<b>tranced_</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 6:14am<b>drirr</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 6:51am<b>Urpoppy</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 4:07am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 12:43pm<b>BananaCoconutty</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 12:33am

BeachGirl27's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

See all of BeachGirl27's badges

BeachGirl27's favorite FMLs

Today, the cut on my face from getting hit with a baseball healed. It's left a dick-shaped scar. FML

by dickface / 03/31/2016 at 9:52pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, our new boss banned coffee from the workplace, comparing caffeine to hard drugs. His comparison may not be wrong; after two hours, I couldn't take it any more, and in between fantasising about his cold-blooded murder, I begged to be allowed just one last cup. FML

by Anonymous / 05/03/2015 at 1:58am / Finland / Work

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend that me switching to "super" sized tampons does not mean I've been having sex with other men with bigger penises, and that my vagina hasn't been "stretched bigger". FML

by Anonymous / 05/03/2015 at 1:37am / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy

Today, at a big family dinner, my dad said, "Pfff, gays don't have it hard at all. The things a guy has to do for sex with a girl? Crazy. All a gay guy has to do for sex is become an altar boy!" My husband's side of the family is very religious, and all hell quickly broke loose. FML

by killme / 03/07/2015 at 1:42pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to try something new with my boyfriend, and sexted him. My text ended up sounding so stupid that I panicked and quickly sent another saying "SORRY WRONG PERSON". FML

by guriak / 07/13/2014 at 9:16pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I got written up for drinking on the job by a manager who drinks on the job, who was told to write me up by a general manager who drinks on the job, and we are all employed by an owner who drinks on the job. I haven't had a drink in 3 weeks. FML

by DJJayLee / 06/23/2014 at 1:45am / United States (Nevada) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while working in a call center at a university, someone threatened to report me to the President of the University because "I" wouldn't accept their daughter who had a 1.5 GPA and "got accepted into Harvard". I don't even make the decisions, I just answer calls. FML

Today, I went to CVS to buy some tampons. The cashier said, "Ewwww... You're on your period." FML

by gracezering / 06/17/2014 at 7:45am / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went to spend my last $50 on gas, since I get paid in 5 days. I paid for the gas and stepped into the restroom briefly. I came out, only to discover that the attendant had put the gas on the wrong pump, and someone had used it for themselves. My tank is empty. FML

Today, I collected a package from a handsome UPS guy. We exchanged smiles, and he even noticeably checked me out. I was feeling really confident for the first time in a while. Then I went inside and saw that I had two huge breastmilk spots on my chest. FML

by BBeffedmylife / 06/14/2014 at 10:18am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my neighbor threatened to call the cops if I didn't turn the volume down on my porno. I was only watching women's tennis. FML

by Mem / 05/30/2014 at 4:07pm / Sweden (Gavleborgs Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, out of habit from twelve years of karate classes, I bowed to my teacher as I exited my classroom. My chemistry classroom. FML

by mathesonn / 05/29/2014 at 7:32pm / United States (New York) / Work

Today, I was at a buffet with my kids and husband. As my boys got up to get more food, I told them they'd better come back with something green on their plate. They both came back with mint ice cream and got a high-five from my husband. FML

by outsmartedbykids / 05/28/2014 at 12:28pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids

Today, I climbed into bed with my sleeping boyfriend after a long shift at work. He immediately rolled over, clamped my leg between his knees, and started viciously humping it. This is the fourth time now, and he still doesn't believe that he even does it. FML

by needanotherbed / 05/28/2014 at 10:21am / United Kingdom (Suffolk) / Love

Today, I got called "un-American" when I said I didn't care about Kim and Kayne's wedding. FML

by Yeppets / 05/28/2014 at 12:13am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous