About BballHottie34 : I play Basketball. I LAX. Im 5"9". I have bright blue eyes and brown hair w/ natural blonde highlights. Any other questions?? Message me(; winky
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Today, I learned that my hairdo must resemble a rat. I found out when a hawk swooped down and dug its claws into my head while I was sunbathing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17198) - you deserved it (4868)
On 12/02/2011 at 12:14am - animals - by inpain - United States (California)
Today, I was casually shopping at Walmart. Everything was normal until the young guy browsing the aisle next to me suddenly approached me and whispered "sperm" into my ear. My spine has never experienced a chill like this one before. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24460) - you deserved it (2850)
On 11/30/2011 at 10:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my boyfriend told me that if I ever cheated on him, he'll chop my body up and dispose of all the parts, but keep my boobies, because he likes them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38576) - you deserved it (6349)
On 11/24/2011 at 5:01am - intimacy - by Faithful - Singapore
Today, I was over at a friend's house for a party. I was trying to strike up a conversation with one of my cute guy friends, so I showed him this funny picture of me that my friend took. His reply was "Hahahaa those Fatbooth pictures are hilarious!" It wasn't a Fatbooth picture. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26756) - you deserved it (903)
On 11/05/2011 at 7:45am - misc - by sophhiee - United States (Maryland)
Today, I was jogging around the neighborhood when I saw an old man on his porch. Being friendly, I waved at him as I ran by. Apparently his idea of greeting someone is pelting them with stones. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16168) - you deserved it (1639)
On 10/27/2011 at 4:06am - misc - by unlucky - United States (Texas)
Today, marks the fourth straight night that my girlfriend has screamed and cried in fear, scratching and kicking me in her sleep. The reason? I took her to see Paranormal Activity 3. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11611) - you deserved it (34497)
On 10/24/2011 at 5:47am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, while on the phone with my boyfriend, I really needed to poop. Badly. He was in the middle of telling a story, so I figured I could get away with muting the phone while on the toilet. Halfway through, he suddenly went silent. I forgot to mute the phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9336) - you deserved it (29009)
On 10/24/2011 at 1:04am - love - by ShitHappens - United States
Today, on my first day of being a trainee teacher in a classroom, I told a boy to stop using that stupid accent or else I'll give him a detention. Turns out he just moved here from Romania. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6621) - you deserved it (58469)
On 10/18/2011 at 12:08pm - kids - by KillMeNow (man) - United Kingdom (Sefton)
Today, while performing a rectal exam on my female patient, I inadvertently said, "Okay, you're going to feel some pleasure now." I meant "pressure". Her husband was in the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35484) - you deserved it (7641)
On 10/18/2011 at 11:01am - intimacy - by imy - United States (Texas)
Today, on my way to work I swerved to avoid hitting a dead animal. Too bad I ended up hitting a live one instead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22138) - you deserved it (7128)
On 10/02/2011 at 7:51am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I realized that it has been so long since my wife and I were intimate that I got slightly turned on watching her suck the meat off chicken wings. I'm jealous of fried, sauce-soaked poultry. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26485) - you deserved it (3337)
On 10/02/2011 at 2:05am - intimacy - by therevsev - United States
Today, my mom and I heard a thump from inside the coat closet. I opened the door, and something fell on me. My mom, who was behind me, screamed, closed the laundry room door, and ran into the garage, leaving me to face the alleged attacker. It was the vacuum. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18758) - you deserved it (1747)
On 09/24/2011 at 12:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)
Today, I was badly sunburnt even after making it a point to apply a lot of sunscreen. My coworkers thought it amusing to slap me every chance they get. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18060) - you deserved it (3113)
On 09/24/2011 at 11:22am - work - by anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I caught my pregnant wife trying to suck milk from her breasts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26096) - you deserved it (4336)
On 09/15/2011 at 3:34am - health - by Scott - United States (California)
Today, I went to my gyn to see what a painful lump is under my armpit. Turns out it's breast tissue, and yes, it will fill up with milk when I'm pregnant. I essentially have three boobs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28387) - you deserved it (285)
On 09/14/2011 at 12:34pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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