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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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Banez

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Banez
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 504
  • Number of comments : 41
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

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Today, I was playing hide and seek with a few friends. I hid in the bathroom, under the sink in a cabinet. I ended up having to sit there quiet as a mouse while my grandfather took an incredibly long and vile dump. I was too afraid to move. Let's just say he didn't rush it. FML

#14272041 (93)

I agree, your life sucks (26118) - you deserved it (6816)

On 12/20/2010 at 12:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my mother, my aunt, and my two sisters are all on their periods. I can't even brush my teeth in my own house without being treated like a criminal. FML

#13641509 (328)

I agree, your life sucks (33132) - you deserved it (3362)

On 10/29/2010 at 8:10pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was sick with the flu so my boyfriend announced that he would make me some chicken soup. It was touching until I stumbled to the kitchen and found out that his "chicken soup" was actually leftover KFC bones boiled in water. FML

#7609495 (222)

I agree, your life sucks (22727) - you deserved it (2737)

On 01/27/2010 at 9:05am - misc - by samantha (woman) - Singapore

Today, at my school, the student council is trying to raise $5000 for Haiti. They are doing so by playing the song from High School Musical in the hallways and cafeteria everyday until they get the money. FML

#7603599 (307)

I agree, your life sucks (29326) - you deserved it (2775)

On 01/27/2010 at 12:07am - misc - by evil - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was at the airport getting ready to go to Hawaii. The guy at the counter said my flight was delayed. It turns out that the flight that was delayed was a flight going to Miami. My flight left at the regular time, and my luggage was on it, because I checked in the night before. FML

#6761430 (30)

I agree, your life sucks (18660) - you deserved it (2120)

On 12/15/2009 at 4:23am - money - by dJ21 (man) - Guam

Today, my little brother punched me in the stomach. When I didn't flinch and he asked me why, I decided to be funny and tell him I was Iron Man and nothing could hurt me. Two seconds later he took a step back and kicked me in the nuts as hard as he could. FML

#6753896 (73)

I agree, your life sucks (7440) - you deserved it (23026)

On 12/14/2009 at 6:46pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was at my 10 year high school reunion. I saw the girl I used to have a BIG crush on, so I decided to go over and say hi. She screams when she sees me. Then, she starts hitting me, looking panicked. I control her and ask why she's hitting me. She says 'Everyone thought you were dead!' FML

#6753136 (89)

I agree, your life sucks (27050) - you deserved it (1468)

On 12/14/2009 at 4:21pm - misc - by Ghost (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend bought me a voice personalized build-a-bear. I thought he was going to propose to me through it, only to press the foot of the bear and hear "we should break up" instead. FML

#6751583 (182)

I agree, your life sucks (27993) - you deserved it (2432)

On 12/14/2009 at 12:00pm - misc - by samgonzalessb - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband was choosing an auto insurance. Geico was $500 and Allstate was $200. He chose Geico because it had a 'cute little lizard.' FML

#6746547 (126)

I agree, your life sucks (20863) - you deserved it (3123)

On 12/14/2009 at 12:03am - money - by Cathy (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while taking a shower, I saw shadows moving across the curtains. The shadow turned out to be a cricket that then fell into the tub. I ran out of the bathroom screaming and naked. My little sister came to my door and said, "If I hadn't just seen your balls, I would swear mom had TWO daughters." FML

#6712676 (152)

I agree, your life sucks (7787) - you deserved it (25192)

On 12/11/2009 at 8:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went to my grandmothers house to pick up her cat for the vet. She forgot who I was and sprayed me in the face with pepper spray. FML

#6658784 (41)

I agree, your life sucks (25245) - you deserved it (1328)

On 12/08/2009 at 12:16am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my daughter's guinea pig got stuck behind the wardrobe, squeaking its head off. I tried pulling the wardrobe towards me to free him, but couldn't take the weight of it all, so it fell over, smashing the TV. The guinea pig is fine. FML

#6568634 (95)

I agree, your life sucks (18618) - you deserved it (4749)

On 12/02/2009 at 2:25pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)



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