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Balletmadxxx

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Balletmadxxx

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  • Number of visits : 1402
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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Balletmadxxx's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my mom and her friends comparing the differences in their nipples. FML

#17211099
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36076) - you deserved it (3702)

On 07/22/2011 at 12:11am - misc - by oliverP123 - United States (New York)

Today, I saved a bird from being run over as it lay in the middle of the road. Thinking it had a broken wing or something, I started carrying it home, intending to take it to the vet later. It crapped in my hand and flew away. FML

#17177469
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27705) - you deserved it (8485)

On 07/19/2011 at 1:45pm - animals - by craphanded - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, I met a really nice guy. He was funny, handsome, and we were both into each other. He told me his name, and when I replied with mine, it came out sounding like "I'm a bear." FML

#17071540
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17290) - you deserved it (14955)

On 07/11/2011 at 9:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I found a very large pumpkin super-glued to my car. It will not come off. FML

#16943359
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33066) - you deserved it (3198)

On 07/02/2011 at 12:46am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I ran over a chipmunk. On my bike. Its mangled carcass got caught in the spokes and decided to join me on my ride. FML

#16637364
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27047) - you deserved it (11355)

On 06/13/2011 at 12:22am - misc - by cycler - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML

#15583575
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25186) - you deserved it (32261)

On 04/01/2011 at 12:32am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I noticed a weird smell coming from my four year old daughter's room. I went to investigate and found she had been using (and hiding) her garbage can as a toilet for when she "can't make it in time." FML

#15420091
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31756) - you deserved it (3891)

On 03/21/2011 at 8:01pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was walking with my crush, and I told him how I felt. As soon as I turned to him, a bird shit on my face. FML

#15251032
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48158) - you deserved it (4316)

On 03/09/2011 at 1:19pm - love - by crazystar69 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I discovered that I can fit back into the clothes I wore in High School. I was proud of this until my husband told me that I look like a stuffed sausage in them. FML

#15113115
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25129) - you deserved it (9774)

On 02/25/2011 at 9:53am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me. Everything was going perfectly, right up until he brought me back to his house to tell his family the good news. When I excused myself to the restroom, I overheard his mom say, "I thought you were going to break up with that stupid slut?" Welcome to the family. FML

#15091892
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38305) - you deserved it (3559)

On 02/23/2011 at 4:52pm - love - by storyofmylife (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was doing my grocery shopping, absent-mindedly wondering if my new diet was working. I got my answer when my panties fell down around my ankles. FML

#14719837
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23517) - you deserved it (7264)

On 01/26/2011 at 12:44pm - misc - by knickersdontfit (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, at the supermarket, my mother stopped in the middle of a lane and imitated a gorilla as a way of asking me from far away if I wanted any bananas. FML

#14616201
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26788) - you deserved it (3857) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 5:50pm - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, in high school, we had a presentation about sex, condoms, etc. After a while, the lady explained that we should get to know our sexual organs better. "For example, my daughter looks at her vagina in front of a mirror to check it out." I’m her daughter. FML

#14614725
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59114) - you deserved it (6117) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - Belgium - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I walked in on my roommate flat-ironing his pubic hair. FML

#14524101
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31919) - you deserved it (3285)

On 01/09/2011 at 7:19pm - health - by curlyisnogood -

Today, I was in gym class talking to a guy I like. My friend then decided to come up behind me and pants me, pulling down my underwear along with them. His only comment? "Someone needs to shave." FML

#14515582
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35330) - you deserved it (6933)

On 01/09/2011 at 12:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States



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