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BadKitty14's favorite FMLs
Today, I was finally paid back by a friend who wrote a check out. Not really looking at it, I went to the bank to deposit it. As I handed it to the teller, I noticed that he had written "sex" in the "for" memo. FML
by Anonymous / 09/16/2012 at 9:46am / United States / Money
Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML
by Anonymous / 09/12/2012 at 3:00am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was cycling with my uncle and became increasingly frustrated as we got further and further from our intended destination. It took me a while to figure out that I had somehow lost my uncle and was following a complete stranger. FML
by Anonymous / 09/10/2012 at 6:40am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/08/2012 at 10:20am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 09/07/2012 at 1:08am / Canada (Alberta) / Kids
Today, the office I work at put up a "No Masturbating at Desks" sign. I'm disappointed by this, not because I usually whack off at my desk, but because enough people do that there needs to be a sign against it. FML
by Anonymous / 08/26/2012 at 7:39pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
Today, I got a phone call out of the blue from a young man, who screamed that he was going to kill me for sleeping with his fiancée. I told him I am a 49-year-old man who hasn't been laid since my wife passed away, four years ago. He stammered, shouted "Well she was a slut too" and hung up. FML
by Anonymous / 08/17/2012 at 8:20pm / United States / Love
Today, after my boyfriend and I had gotten frisky last night, I found a note on the front door of my building that read, "Dear girl in apartment 3D, from now on please close the blinds all the way or lose 30 pounds. Either would be acceptable." FML
by Anonymous / 08/10/2012 at 1:29am / Europe / Intimacy
by Badkitty14 / 08/09/2012 at 4:16pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
Today, my fiancée's OCD hit a new low when she screamed at me for flicking the light-switch off "the wrong way". This led to her flicking it on and off about a dozen times, followed by a twenty-minute lecture on how to do it "properly". We're getting married next month. FML
by Anonymous / 07/27/2012 at 5:23pm / Romania (Bucuresti) / Love
by Anonymous / 07/25/2012 at 6:54am / United States (California) / Kids
by marquez_jasmine / 07/21/2012 at 11:08am / Canada (Ontario) / Love
by Steve / 06/13/2012 at 5:30pm / United States (Louisiana) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 05/24/2012 at 12:59am / United States (Texas) / Work
by colts609380 / 05/17/2012 at 5:07pm / United States (California) / Love
- Today, my girlfriend announced to everyone at dinner that she was no longer a virgin. This was news… Today, I was at a party with my boyfriend. There were some tents set up out the back so we decided… Today, I was having sex with my new boyfriend, and I realized that he enjoys making airplane sound…
- Today, I was pissing liquid out of my rear for what seemed like an eternity. In the wrong bathroom.… Today, my suspicions were confirmed- my husband is cheating on me. With his cousin who lives across… Today, I paid for POF membership. Now I can see all the girls who are looking at my profile and not…