About BadKitty13 : IT'S 5:00 SOMEWHERE ......
Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur...
Happy kitty, sleepy kitty, purr, purr, purr...
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Today, a frog made my hot tub his new home. I can't stand frogs and he moves lightening fast. I think the only way to get rid of him is to turn the heat on and boil him. Which I would do if my daughter didn't already adore him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21556) - you deserved it (9199)
On 03/14/2011 at 8:57pm - kids - by BSwan (woman) - Australia
Today, I spent almost two hours cleaning my fish tank, only to find out that my cat had secretly eaten all of my fish while I was cleaning the tank. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28584) - you deserved it (6970)
On 03/14/2011 at 3:52pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I lost my cat. It's deaf, so no matter what I do it can't hear me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35045) - you deserved it (3497)
On 03/09/2011 at 3:03pm - animals - by blahhlovely_30 (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I discovered that the demonic voice that made me nearly piss myself all night, was my sister's Furby she stuck in the closet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30797) - you deserved it (5361)
On 03/06/2011 at 2:38pm - misc - by Spooked (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was in the bathroom, when someone came up behind me. Instead of waiting for a urinal to free up, he wedged his way in between me and another guy, and promptly began peeing in my urinal, crossing streams in the process. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35704) - you deserved it (2999)
On 03/05/2011 at 3:26pm - misc - by devinbyrne - United States (Texas)
Today, as I was about to go in the bathroom, a girl walked out, shaking water off her hands. Some of it landed on my face, and I just wiped it off. Then she said to her friend who was waiting for her, "The sink's broken. Can I use your hand sanitizer?" So what landed on my face? FML
I agree, your life sucks (31264) - you deserved it (2064)
On 03/05/2011 at 5:15am - misc - by anon (man) - United States (California)
Today, I learned that if I don't clean out the litter box everyday, my cat will resort to shitting in the laundry basket. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8894) - you deserved it (22541)
On 03/03/2011 at 7:45pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)
Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML
I agree, your life sucks (14098) - you deserved it (66967)
On 03/01/2011 at 6:51pm - intimacy - by Anon. (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I learned that it's cute when a goat comes up to you and licks your face. That is, until you realize that goat was just eating poison ivy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21914) - you deserved it (4743)
On 03/01/2011 at 10:00am - health - by a -
Today, I was informed that due to my cat being aggressive and attacking the postman several times, my mail would no longer be delivered to my address. I don't own a cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29236) - you deserved it (1800)
On 03/01/2011 at 5:41am - animals - by notacatperson (woman) - United Kingdom (Plymouth)
Today, I woke up after a night out drinking on my sofa, with an electric dog collar around my neck and handcuffs on my wrists. The keys were on the other side of the invisible doggy fence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10275) - you deserved it (25933)
On 02/28/2011 at 8:10pm - health - by stupiddrunk (man) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, after we'd let an author rent out our cabin, we read in the book of poems he wrote while staying that he'd described how he enjoyed sitting on our table naked. The same table we often eat off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21446) - you deserved it (3650)
On 02/28/2011 at 12:44am - intimacy - by Username -
Today, while having sex, I found out that I'm so flexible that when I bend over backwards, the backs of my knees can touch my shoulders. My boyfriend is now extremely jealous and is debating about breaking up with me. Even I don't get it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36953) - you deserved it (3259)
On 02/25/2011 at 11:03am - intimacy - by inder (woman) - United Kingdom (Stoke-on-Trent)
Today, I was going down on my girlfriend. I thought everything was going well, then all of a sudden she gets up and screams at me "IT'S NOT A TACO EATING COMPETITION, CHILL OUT." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17856) - you deserved it (36556)
On 02/23/2011 at 5:06am - intimacy - by failed (man) - Switzerland (Vaud)
Today, I downloaded an application for my phone that reads whatever you type out loud. I started making it say things like "You like it when daddy spanks your tight little ass don't you?" Just as the message was playing back out loud, my mom walked up the stairs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7470) - you deserved it (37427)
On 02/17/2011 at 2:02am - intimacy - by biglady (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)
Monday 17 June 2013
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