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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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B_Foxy

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B_Foxy
  • Town/Country : Wisconsin, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2328
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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B_Foxy's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend took me to meet his friends at one of his exclusive "clubs." Expecting it to be his old friends from college, I agreed to go. Apparently, I've been dating a member of the Ku Klux Klan for 2 years. FML

#7380749 (55)

I agree, your life sucks (48642) - you deserved it (5096)

On 01/16/2010 at 4:24pm - love - by Awkward (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while at work at a maternity and baby clothes store, I was supposed to send out an email about our "Beat the Clock" sale. After it was sent to over 500 people, I realized that I'd misspelled the subject line. It read, "Beat the Cock Sale." FML

#7336635 (122)

I agree, your life sucks (8432) - you deserved it (19102)

On 01/14/2010 at 10:55am - work - by Oops (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend informed me that sharing a bed with me was like sleeping with a seizing cat. FML

#7330766 (40)

I agree, your life sucks (15211) - you deserved it (2712)

On 01/13/2010 at 11:27pm - love - by meow (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my brother and his friend ambushed me, tied me to a chair, and put a sock in my mouth. My mom found me 10 minutes later, took the sock out, and asked, "Why are you tied to a chair?" I told her what happened. She looked at me, laughed, stuffed the sock back in my mouth, and left. FML

#7319771 (121)

I agree, your life sucks (27375) - you deserved it (3278)

On 01/13/2010 at 2:36pm - misc - by boundandgagged (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my mom held an intervention for me. Yesterday, I told her I'd tried pot once. Seven years ago. FML

#6983853 (120)

I agree, your life sucks (21231) - you deserved it (3712)

On 12/28/2009 at 12:02am - health - by EgoMoose (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my mom revealed to me that when I was in Preschool, I used to get caught in the bathroom with little boys while I was feeling their "no no" area. I was giving hand jobs to boys before I could read. FML

#6768891 (163)

I agree, your life sucks (18644) - you deserved it (4877)

On 12/15/2009 at 9:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to see a play. I'm pregnant, so I always need to pee. At intermission, I ran to use the bathroom, but there was a really long line. I asked the woman in front of me if I could pass her. She responded, "You don't look pregnant!", and lectured me about lying while I peed my pants. FML

#6737603 (152)

I agree, your life sucks (27947) - you deserved it (1618)

On 12/13/2009 at 11:53am - misc - by justine (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got a call from my girlfriend of 13 months. She told me that she had gotten chlamydia from the guy she cheated on me with, and that I most likely have it too. I gave her a diamond ring, she gave me chlamydia. FML

#6694429 (69)

I agree, your life sucks (18464) - you deserved it (1496)

On 12/10/2009 at 2:00pm - intimacy - by Godi (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was watching TV with my mom. The new Trojan Ecstasy condom commercial came on. I sat there awkwardly while my mom pulled out her shopping list. I bet you can guess what she added. FML

#6680888 (73)

I agree, your life sucks (12546) - you deserved it (1235)

On 12/09/2009 at 2:27pm - intimacy - by aawkward... (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my mom admitted that her story about my dad leaving us for his current wife was a lie. He left when he caught her with a coworker. She blocked his number and got a restraining order to keep him from telling his side of the story. I haven't talked to my dad for six years because of this. FML

#6590388 (146)

I agree, your life sucks (35750) - you deserved it (1137)

On 12/03/2009 at 9:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got my first acting part. I played the role of a bad boy who has to grab the leading lady's ass, who then slaps me in the face. The ass grab was done in one take. The slap required 14 takes. FML

#6570901 (138)

I agree, your life sucks (28029) - you deserved it (3263)

On 12/02/2009 at 6:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was in line in the grocery store with my 3 year old son. He was holding a tub of yogurt that had a cow with sunglasses on on it. He shouted, "Mommy, look at the fat cow with the sunglasses on!" To my horror, the obese woman in front of us turned around. She was wearing sunglasses. FML

#6533285 (181)

I agree, your life sucks (36040) - you deserved it (2054)

On 11/30/2009 at 1:59pm - misc - by annonymous - United States (California)

Today, I overhead my mother's request to be spanked harder by my dad. FML

#6532125 (62)

I agree, your life sucks (19041) - you deserved it (1636)

On 11/30/2009 at 11:51am - intimacy - by NeedHeadPhone (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mom sat on a pencil and started bleeding. She then made me clean the wound on her butt and put ointment on it. FML

#6522437 (111)

I agree, your life sucks (24105) - you deserved it (3216)

On 11/29/2009 at 9:39pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a mall cop tore up my 'Free hugs' sign. FML

#6489895 (153)

I agree, your life sucks (24740) - you deserved it (9853)

On 11/28/2009 at 2:13am - misc - by Cornbreesha (man) - United States (Illinois)