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About AugustBurnsToast : Why hellooooooo there :0
I love music and enjoy playing guitar for my metalcore/post-hardcore band.
Ask me whatever.
Have a beautiful day :)
ps. Searching 'Scott Chessin' will find me on instagram (where I try to post great pics)
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Today, I started my job as one of those sign spinners. About an hour later, some people drove up, yelled, "Bitch, get off my corner," and threw water balloons at me. My boss made me keep working in the soaking wet outfit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5310) - you deserved it (534)
On 05/17/2012 at 6:02pm - work - by poseidon5213 - United States (California)
Today, I called my boyfriend during his lunch break. He started to place his order at a fast food joint, and trying to be funny, I started moaning sexily after each part of his order. I eventually realised I was on speaker when I heard snickering in the background. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1344) - you deserved it (6130)
On 05/16/2012 at 4:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Limburg)
Today, I received an email from my girlfriend listing 10 ways to stop premature ejaculation. Subtle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4056) - you deserved it (1499)
On 05/15/2012 at 10:53pm - intimacy - by quick blow (man) - United States
Today, if you live in California, you might have seen a crazy drunk guy naked in front of a McDonald's, waving at everyone. Yeah, that was probably me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1885) - you deserved it (7292)
On 05/13/2012 at 6:30pm - misc - by smh (man) - United States (California)
Today, I asked my dad if my girlfriend could sleep over. He winked at me and agreed. When I brought her home, we went to my room for a quickie. There, I saw that my dad had taped multiple Richard Simmons posters to the wall, causing my girlfriend to suddenly come down with a "headache." FML
I agree, your life sucks (3061) - you deserved it (5243)
On 05/11/2012 at 2:29pm - love - by cockblocked (man) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I got a parking ticket while I was in the car. I didn't even notice it happen. Ninja cops do exist. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5449) - you deserved it (1613)
On 05/07/2012 at 10:52pm - money - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I confronted my girlfriend about cheating on me. Her response was that it's not cheating since she is getting paid. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23277) - you deserved it (2262)
On 05/06/2012 at 8:13pm - intimacy - by madseason (man) - United States
Today, my boyfriend thought it was a good show of etiquette to answer a text message from his ex, while he was still inside me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6755) - you deserved it (731)
On 05/04/2012 at 4:57pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)
Today, I was petting my cat and I jokingly said out loud, "Oh, the pussy likes it rough? You like that, don't you?" My windows were open and I could hear the neighbors laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1766) - you deserved it (5351)
On 05/03/2012 at 8:39pm - intimacy - by anonymous4991 (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I accidentally adopted a dolphin for $125. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2758) - you deserved it (6262)
On 05/02/2012 at 10:39pm - money - by Optimus_Prime97 - United States
Today, a repairman came to fix my couch, which is under warranty because the frame had broken in multiple places. To ensure I got a new couch out of the deal, I stabbed multiple holes into the cushion. The guy fixed the frame, but said there was nothing he could do about lacerations on the sofa. FML
I agree, your life sucks (882) - you deserved it (18661)
On 05/02/2012 at 8:43pm - misc - by grovage - United States
Today, it was confirmed that the "no pet rule" in my apartment complex is so strict that I'm not even allowed to have sea monkeys. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6087) - you deserved it (659)
On 05/01/2012 at 11:59pm - animals - by Monkeyless (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, I got some spam stating that I'd have no love life in the coming 10 years if I didn't reply to it. So, no different to the last 10 years then. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5404) - you deserved it (660)
On 05/01/2012 at 1:14am - love - by monkeywrench (woman) - United States
Today, I had to take my 15-year-old daughter to remove the handcuffs her father had placed on her as a joke. He didn't know they were real. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5690) - you deserved it (557)
On 04/30/2012 at 12:44am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my wife woke me up by giving my erect penis a Chinese burn. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6245) - you deserved it (676)
On 04/28/2012 at 12:42am - intimacy - by poo4brains - New Zealand (Canterbury)
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