Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

AsnNightmare

Search for a member

AsnNightmare
  • Town/Country : Waalwijk, Netherlands
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 17 June 1996 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 879
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About AsnNightmare : I'm Chinese, I'm a Otaku, My daily routine is watching 4-hours of anime (A 12-Episode Season).
For the rest of it, i have nothing better to do in my life, You do? Well good for you. (:

Now a little bit info about myself:

Likes: Anime, Romantic things, Manga, Music, Light Novels, EROGE

AsnNightmare's last visitors

marmar9407FreezexXDubbleChicZebrasofa13lolmyendoff456poopBABTcakesDaaniellee1234SapphireSympathyLil1LawensKie

AsnNightmare's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

AsnNightmare's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom told me that she was selling my favorite thing in the world, my trombone. The only thing that I'm good at is the trombone. FML

#15026564
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30618) - you deserved it (4649)

On 02/18/2011 at 9:47am - misc - by ihavenothing - United States (Texas)

Today, my friend came over with brownies as a treat before work. She works in a bakery so I thought it was lovely. After starting work, I became stoned. She thought it was a great prank. I was fired. FML

#15025975
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31852) - you deserved it (3011)

On 02/18/2011 at 8:06am - work - by sickly -

Today, instead of pushing me away or simply stopping for a minute, my girlfriend kept kissing me as she was trying to get phlegm out of her throat. The slimy goo ended up in the back of my mouth. I can still taste it. FML

#15024554
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34167) - you deserved it (3417)

On 02/18/2011 at 2:35am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, I came home to a lease violation and a $220 fine after a routine pest control visit. The violation: my single beta fish in a small bowl. FML

#15023779
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22843) - you deserved it (3977)

On 02/18/2011 at 12:19am - animals - by Username -

Today, my Dad gave me the dreaded sex talk, but he got sidetracked and started talking about how good my mum was in bed. FML

#14998029
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42370) - you deserved it (3430)

On 02/16/2011 at 12:50am - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML

#14968643
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44127) - you deserved it (8918)

On 02/14/2011 at 1:24am - misc - by bride (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mom left me at home with a babysitter. I'm 17. FML

#14941696
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30319) - you deserved it (3918)

On 02/11/2011 at 10:10pm - misc - by allgrowedup - United States (Texas)

Today, I was attacked by clowns at work. I don't work at the circus. FML

#14894865
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26643) - you deserved it (3117)

On 02/08/2011 at 11:27am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my girlfriend called me to pick her up from jail. She'd been arrested for indecent exposure. FML

#14674981
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23082) - you deserved it (3669)

On 01/22/2011 at 3:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, my parents confiscated my iPod, because the parents' group they go to came to the conclusion that music is a gateway to anti-social behavior. FML

#14674940
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25650) - you deserved it (1761)

On 01/22/2011 at 3:20pm - misc - by ihatemyparents (man) - United States (California)

Today, whilst having sex, my husband screamed out a man's name. FML

#14671725
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48870) - you deserved it (4491)

On 01/22/2011 at 8:00am - intimacy - by fmlalways - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, a man dressed as Santa Claus walked by me, grabbing my butt. He smelled of pipe tobacco and pee. He pulled me close to him and whispered, "I bet you're naughty but you feel so nice." I looked dumbfounded at him as he winked and yelled, "You're on my list." FML

#14208916
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34915) - you deserved it (3598)

On 12/15/2010 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I got very drunk after being fired from my job. In my depressed, intoxicated state, I posted my facebook status as 'Goodbye world'. The only response was from my dad saying 'cya'. His comment got 29 likes. FML

#13560342
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34110) - you deserved it (9243)

On 10/23/2010 at 9:15am - misc - by drunkfacebookuser (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my friend posted my picture on Craigslist under the "men seeking men" section. I got 16 replies with 2 hours. He then decided to post another picture of me under "men seeking women" to compare results. The only reply I got was from a man. FML

#3713033
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41936) - you deserved it (3494)

On 07/13/2009 at 9:09am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got hypnotized at my school's variety show. Apparently, when asked to do something I enjoy doing, I began to violently hump the floor. FML

#2722142
268 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79323) - you deserved it (19069)

On 06/08/2009 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by OhGeez (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: