About Aryn16 : sixteeeeen.!
About Aryn16 : sixteeeeen.!
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Aryn16's favorite FMLs
Today, I was visiting my cousin's farm. Going out for a morning stroll, I took an apple with me to munch along the way. As I was eating it, I heard a distant thumping sound and was suddenly slammed into the ground. When I looked up, a horse was eating my apple. I got mugged by a horse. FML
by Anonymous / 08/14/2013 at 5:11am / United States (Florida) / Animals
by tdrtnlz / 05/11/2013 at 2:25am / United Kingdom (Warwickshire) / Love
Today, I was out with my grandma when a pair of very shady guys approached us in the street, hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride, she pulled a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck, gran? FML
by emasculated 10000% / 05/04/2013 at 1:05pm / Sweden (Kronobergs Lan) / Miscellaneous
Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML
by wtfmama / 05/04/2013 at 8:51am / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids
by MrConcise / 05/01/2013 at 12:28pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I went on a run. Going a decent pace, I passed a woman walking her dog. I joked, "C'mon! Keep up!" Thirty feet later I stepped in mud, rolled my ankle and fell. The woman walked by as I lay in agony, and told me to keep up. FML
by luvs2spooge89 / 05/01/2013 at 10:27am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, while paying a $60 tab on drinks for a girl, a guy grabs the money-clip out of my hand and runs. I start to chase after him; the girl trips me, then runs after him. The bartender calls the cops; not to catch the thieves, but to report me for not paying. FML
by Sean / 05/01/2013 at 12:44am / Canada (Quebec) / Kids
Today, I spent hours playing my guitar and singing in the street, hoping to make some extra cash. About 3 hours in, I realized some punk had been walking around with a hat taking money as if he was with me. FML
by honeynuggetviolin / 04/30/2013 at 8:31pm / Money
Today, it's my wedding day. I have a cold sore that makes me look like The Joker. Make-up won't cover it and the emergency medicine my doctor gave me only irritates it more. My future husband asks, "Why so serious?" and laughs whenever he sees me. Fantastic. FML
by sharibaby / 04/30/2013 at 5:26pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
Today, I took my wife's cat to the vet for her yearly check up. I'm finishing the day at the hospital with multiple bite wounds and a deep gash in my leg. My wife chose to comfort her cat instead. FML
by good husband / 04/30/2013 at 12:03pm / Canada / Animals
Today, I was small talking with an elderly man, who told me that nobody cares about him. Even though I had only known him for an hour, to try and make him feel a little better I told him I care about him. He then called me a creep, stomped his cane onto my foot, and walked off. FML
by 'creep' / 04/22/2013 at 1:01am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
Today, my girlfriend from high school contacted me, telling me we should hang out some time; I casually agreed. Two hours later she's on my doorstep in tears, wanting me to take her back. She's married with kids. I live four states away and haven't a clue how she found out where I live. FML
by Anonymous / 04/21/2013 at 7:26pm / United States / Love
by wallet? GONE / 04/21/2013 at 6:27pm / United States (Colorado) / Money
by gamerguru13 / 04/21/2013 at 8:26am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, I found out my parents have been slipping birth control pills into my morning orange juice… 2Today, I found out my husband has been catfishing my sixteen year-old brother for over a year. FML 3Today, I babysat a kid who was such a bratty little prick that I actually considered walking out on…
- Today, I was hitting on a cute girl on the bus. It was going well, and she gave me her name to add… Today, I had to escort some dumbass teenager from Home Depot after I found him masturbating in one… Today, my boyfriend still couldn't work out where my clitoris is. It's RIGHT THERE, you idiot. I've…