Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Arxikist

Search for a member

Arxikist

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 644
  • Number of comments : 114
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Arxikist : In sum, I'm basically a Football WR, Hockey RW. Atheist, Patriotic city-boy from Canada. I mostly use the app so I probably won't your message if you send me one. To avoid getting thumbs down from me do not mention/ do the following:

- Talk about yourself randomly
- Talk about peoples PP
- Talk about religion
- Say "lol", "haha", etc.
- Be stupid in general
- Don't kiss anyone's ass (especially DocBastard's)
- Don't fake you know the OP
- Don't fake you are the OP

Arxikist's page activity

Visits<b>emsnice240</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 4:32pm<b>MandyCat484</b> - the 11/17/2013 at 2:08pm<b>ms_fancypants</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 11:58pm<b>clm123455</b> - the 05/28/2012 at 1:38pm<b>etharay</b> - the 01/05/2012 at 7:02am

Arxikist's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Arxikist's favorite FMLs

Today, while having sex, I told my boyfriend that I love him. I could feel him go soft inside me. FML

#18657042
312 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42917) - you deserved it (9111)

On 12/30/2011 at 8:36pm - intimacy - by KrissyBearr - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I woke up to slight memory of my boyfriend leaving for work an hour earlier than originally planned due to "excessive sweat" in my bed. When I removed my sheets and took in a deep whiff, my olfactory receptors instantly knew that his so called "sweat" was actually his urine. FML

#18642967
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25659) - you deserved it (2582)

On 12/29/2011 at 9:51am - misc - by dontpeeonmenxtime (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I walked in on my mom, braiding my dad's pubic hair. I don't know what scarred me more; my mom braiding his pubic hair or the fact that his pubic hair is long enough to be braided. FML

#18479276
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48103) - you deserved it (3607)

On 12/10/2011 at 8:03pm - intimacy - by Joe (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I walked out of the store, car keys in hand, only to discover my car was missing. After a frantic search, I started to hyperventilate and a nearly had a full-blown panic attack. Then I remembered I walked to the store. I am an idiot. FML

#18460733
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21173) - you deserved it (29082)

On 12/08/2011 at 2:58pm - misc - by picklemonger - Canada

Today, marks the two weeks since my paycheck should have arrived. During these two weeks, my battery has failed, tire has blown, and my phone and water bill have become past due. When I called the guy who's supposed to pay me, he said he has a note about it "somewhere on my desk". FML

#18460335
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24347) - you deserved it (1881)

On 12/08/2011 at 1:14pm - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I took my daughter to see Santa at the mall. When I went to pick her up from Santa's lap, my watch snagged on his beard, pulling it off in front of my daughter and about twenty kids in line. My daughter still isn't speaking to me. FML

#18460196
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26452) - you deserved it (4443)

On 12/08/2011 at 12:41pm - kids - by childdreamkiller (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while standing completely still at Walmart, I was hit by a drunk man on a Jazzy Scooter. He laughed, said it was an accident, gunned the scooter and took out two more people. FML

#18459479
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22996) - you deserved it (2273)

On 12/08/2011 at 9:48am - misc - by skidmark (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got into a car accident. The other party left the scene immediately after without exchanging insurance information. Deer can be so rude. FML

#18267814
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26733) - you deserved it (7942)

On 11/16/2011 at 9:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: