Arxikist

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Arxikist

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1593
  • Number of comments : 114
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Arxikist : In sum, I'm basically a Football WR, Hockey RW. Atheist, Patriotic city-boy from Canada. I mostly use the app so I probably won't your message if you send me one. To avoid getting thumbs down from me do not mention/ do the following:

- Talk about yourself randomly
- Talk about peoples PP
- Talk about religion
- Say "lol", "haha", etc.
- Be stupid in general
- Don't kiss anyone's ass (especially DocBastard's)
- Don't fake you know the OP
- Don't fake you are the OP

Arxikist's page activity

Visits<b>iraisadumbass</b> - the 10/17/2015 at 10:20am<b>playhard_51</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 2:20pm<b>ScratchCatPower</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 8:40pm<b>hellogourgeous13</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 3:34pm<b>Moonditch</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 2:59am<b>emsnice240</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 4:32pm<b>MandyCat484</b> - the 11/17/2013 at 2:08pm<b>ms_fancypants</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 11:58pm<b>clm123455</b> - the 05/28/2012 at 1:38pm<b>etharay</b> - the 01/05/2012 at 7:02am

Arxikist's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Arxikist's favorite FMLs

Today, I got stuck in a revolving door. FML

by pmony / 02/01/2012 at 9:48pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, while helping my mom to cook, I was reminded that when the fire alarm goes off in our house, dinner is ready. FML

by JohhnyKeroscene / 02/01/2012 at 7:21am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to see a doctor about some of the memory problems I've been having. After the appointment, I could barely remember a thing he told me. FML

by louie / 01/31/2012 at 3:17pm / United States (Oregon) / Health

Today, I spent two hours perfecting a really romantic text message to my boyfriend for our one year anniversary. I listed all the things I loved about him, and recalled some of our best times together. Two minutes after I sent it, he replied, "Huh?" FML

by upupandaway / 01/30/2012 at 6:51pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I drove home from work, only to find both my next-door neighbours loudly arguing in the middle of my driveway. I got out and asked them what the hell was going on, only to find out one of their inbred kids had put a brick through my back window, and each is claiming the other did it. FML

by Anonymous / 01/30/2012 at 6:45pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I cut my finger with a plastic knife while demonstrating that you can't cut yourself with a plastic knife. FML

by cbad / 01/30/2012 at 10:27am / United States / Health

Today, I realized that my husband and I are at that point in our marriage where "sleeping together" means scooting closer to each other in the bed. FML

by oldsoulyoungbody / 01/30/2012 at 10:07am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I picked up my driver's licence and my keys off the floor at the same time, using only my toes. This was the highlight of my day. FML

by Anonymous / 01/30/2012 at 1:36am / Australia (Tasmania) / Transportation

Today, I arrived at the pizza place I work at to find that I'd been fired. Apparently, the class stoner came in last night and not only demanded a free pizza, but also claimed that I always gave him one. I've never talked to this kid in my life, but my boss still doesn't believe me. FML

by LowerCrust / 01/29/2012 at 9:36pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, I had a swollen knee, and was slowly limping to the toilet. All of a sudden, my mom ran past me, beating me to it. As she closed the door, she said, "AT LEAST I CAN RUN!" FML

by Jen_ / 01/26/2012 at 5:08pm / France / Health

Today, I cut my finger with a knife while cooking. I work in a hospital and have to use hand disinfectant at least every twenty minutes. It hurts badly. I have to work for eight hours. FML

by StupidNurse / 01/26/2012 at 4:57pm / Germany / Work

Today, at school, I was scheduled to give a presentation to my class. As I arrived, my teacher said to me, "You're bleeding from the 120th pimple on your left cheek." FML

by elite / 01/19/2012 at 4:59pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I spun a two year old upside down, in circles. She wasn't remotely dizzy. I threw up on myself. FML

by Anonymous / 01/12/2012 at 1:41pm / United Kingdom (London) / Kids

Today, I had shelves installed using a builder who came highly recommended by my co-worker. Turns out the builder is her friend, who has no actual qualifications or experience as a builder, but 'it's his dream'. I now have a gaping hole in my kitchen where the shelves should be. FML

by neveragain89 / 01/05/2012 at 7:37pm / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, as I was finishing running a mile, my entire class begun to cheer me on. I felt happy since I don't have many friends. Only when I got closer did I realize that they were cheering for the girl behind me, and in fact, not one person was cheering for me. FML

by silvernights21 / 01/05/2012 at 6:40pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous