About Aroha020 : * Love women
* Movies
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* Being outdoors
* Sports
Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
Today, I found out I'm actually the uncle of my children. All four of them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (75804) - you deserved it (4350)
On 05/14/2013 at 3:13am - kids - by Liferuinedforever (man) - Pakistan (Sindh)
Today, I came home from work to my 4-year old daughter cussing left and right. I asked her about it; she said that her brother had taught her some words. When I confronted him about the situation, he kicked my shin and screamed, "Stop treating me like a fucking child!" He's 5. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33186) - you deserved it (12590)
On 03/28/2013 at 9:13pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I found out my mom thought I was a lesbian because I dated a girl in high school. I didn't date anyone in high school. Apparently, guys never asked me out because my best friend told everyone that I was her girlfriend. I had a two-year lesbian relationship that I never knew about. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39248) - you deserved it (1935)
On 03/21/2013 at 8:35pm - love - by SmallAngel (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I found out why my boyfriend likes to do my hair and makeup for me. Far from it being some kind of fetish or hobby, it's because he thinks I do such a crappy job that feels he has to apply it himself so I don't "embarrass" him when we're out in public together. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24949) - you deserved it (8177)
On 03/14/2013 at 5:01pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Thuringen)
Today, I started at my new job. The woman who I'll be working right next to 40 hours a week introduced herself with, "I know what your name is. I know what you're planning, and I've been sent to destroy you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (25445) - you deserved it (2280)
On 02/18/2013 at 5:15pm - work - by ari (woman) - United States
Today, while riding the train home, I noticed a man who kept looking at me. Annoyed, I told him to be less obvious and to stop staring. He promptly responded, "Bitch, I'm gay, and even I can tell no one would want to look at you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (9507) - you deserved it (37753)
On 02/14/2013 at 2:39am - misc - by assoutofuandme (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I went to a concert with my girlfriend. Some guy grabbed her ass, and I tried to fight him. I ended up with a concussion and a messed up jaw. Her? Oh, she beat the shit out of him while I was unconscious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33549) - you deserved it (9855)
On 01/01/2013 at 5:30am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)
Today, I woke up on my boyfriend's bedroom floor. When I asked him why I was there, he said I'd gotten too hot, so he rolled me off his bed. I have the flu and a fever. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27209) - you deserved it (2355)
On 12/25/2012 at 11:56pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I came home to find all of the wood in my house either broken or gone. On the now legless table there was a note from my mother, saying that she needed the wood to build a boat, and that I will thank her when the world ends. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21934) - you deserved it (1223)
On 12/09/2012 at 10:29am - misc - by woodless (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, during a conversation, my boss said, "What, what?" Before I could stop myself, I replied, "In the butt." FML
I agree, your life sucks (9459) - you deserved it (19008)
On 12/04/2012 at 9:43pm - work - by whitecollar - United Kingdom (York)
Today, my girlfriend dared me to put on her bra and panties and give her a lap dance. Feeling spontaneous, I decided to do it. Just as I was getting really into it, she told me I was on webcam for all her friends. Apparently it was a contest of who had their boyfriend the most whipped. She won. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36416) - you deserved it (9571)
On 11/23/2012 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Embarassed (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, on my job as a police officer, I received a typical domestic disturbance call. Not so typical was the address. Guess my wife's affair went terribly wrong while I was on shift. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31449) - you deserved it (1153)
On 11/09/2012 at 2:18am - love - by SebastianMiko (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my girlfriend, who I've loved and dated for over a year, confessed that she's actually straight as an arrow. All this time, she's basically been using me as an accessory to enhance her "social status" and make her guy friends horny. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27435) - you deserved it (3116)
On 08/10/2012 at 6:06pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Thailand (Krung Thep)
Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29505) - you deserved it (2878)
Today, my daughter was still acting out her teenage issues. This morning, when I told her to, "Have a nice day" she screamed at me, "DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (23173) - you deserved it (3051) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 05/30/2012 at 6:41pm - kids - by Aldoch -
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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