About Arcterion : 22, Male, metalhead, pothead, pervert, misanthropist.
Sick according to some, insane according to others.
Fascinated by the morbid, bizarre and disturbing.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I was sitting in my basement watching IT. I heard a knocking at my door and turned the outside lights on to see a clown outside staring in at me. I freaked out and began screaming and jumping around like a Chihuahua on drugs. My friends told me it should be on YouTube within the week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43463) - you deserved it (6383)
On 05/29/2009 at 4:14pm - misc - by dumbo (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I picked up my 4-year-old daughter from day care. As we're driving home, a butterfly lands on the windshield. Just as my daughter comments on how pretty the butterfly is, I turned a corner and accidentally hit the windshield wipers and smeared the pretty butterfly across the windshield. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38654) - you deserved it (8684)
On 05/29/2009 at 4:13pm - animals - by reb2632 (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I had sex with a new guy. After we were done, he noticed my lighter on my nightstand and said "I've always wanted to try that!" He put the lighter by his butt and fart into it, producing a flame. After, when he left, I sat there, naked, mortified. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52927) - you deserved it (10167)
On 05/29/2009 at 1:52pm - intimacy - by FMLFMLFMLFML (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I went to a real Japanese restaurant with my sister and mom, where you had to take off your shoes and sit on the floor. After the meal, I realized my shoes were no longer where I put them. For the seven years the restaurant has been open, I'm the first person to get their shoes stolen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42100) - you deserved it (2731)
On 05/27/2009 at 8:51pm - misc - by Jdub (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I was in my back yard and I saw my neighbours daughter choking on something. I ran over and gave her the heimlich maneuver. It turns out her friend was recording her while she was doing her drama project for school. I broke two of her ribs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40609) - you deserved it (11938)
On 05/27/2009 at 7:45pm - misc - by Bob (man) - Canada (New Brunswick)
Today, my last task for the day as a high school janitor was to power-wash the concrete area where the graduation ceremony will take place. Tired and bored, I drew a huge penis with the power hose. Right before I was going to wash it off, the machine broke. Graduation is tomorrow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13219) - you deserved it (52600)
On 05/27/2009 at 7:10pm - work - by waterproblem (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my kitten was playing with the drawstring on my pajama pants. He then jumped, clinging on to my crotch. I screamed in pain, which scared him and made him hold on tighter. My cat was literally hanging from my vagina with its claws for a good 30 seconds before I could pry him off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51445) - you deserved it (5765)
On 05/27/2009 at 6:44pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, me and my girlfriend were heading back to her place. On the way there, she was rubbing and stroking me. When we got there, I asked her mom for a congrats hug. I forgot I had a hard on from my girlfriend. She felt it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14618) - you deserved it (49287)
On 05/27/2009 at 5:45am - intimacy - by arctic1 (man) - United States (Alaska)
Today, I saw this tourist almost get hit by a cab. After he walked away I complained to my boyfriend about how idiotic people like him just deserve to die. After 5 blocks of my ranting the tourist turns around and says "I'm right in front of you bitch." I hid behind my laughing boyfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5476) - you deserved it (60079)
On 05/26/2009 at 11:08pm - misc - by Ash (woman) - United States (Alabama)
Today, I wanted revenge on the rabbit who ate my garden's plants. When he returned, he was standing next to my brand new above-ground swimming pool. I pull out my 22. rifle and shot at it, but the bullet missed and popped a hole in my pool. 15,000 gallons of water flooded my basement. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22569) - you deserved it (186936)
On 05/26/2009 at 8:22pm - misc - by Jerrrr (man) - United States (New York)
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Attempting to make things a little more exciting, I said in my sexiest voice "oh yeah, harder." My boyfriend who apparently doesn't like talking dirty, pulled out and angrily said "I was trying, what more do you want?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (62798) - you deserved it (14104)
On 05/26/2009 at 12:53pm - intimacy - by alexis89 (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my wife and I watched a documentary film about a kid living with severe asthma. In one scene, the kid has a severe asthma attack, and is rushed to hospital. My wife started laughing hysterically at this and after apologising, goes "it's just he sounded exactly like you in bed." FML
I agree, your life sucks (57165) - you deserved it (5711)
On 05/26/2009 at 4:24am - intimacy - by Weezylover (man) - United Kingdom (Manchester)
Today, I decided to scare my 10 year old sister for fun. I hid behind a door and leapt out, shouting "Boo!" when she walked by. She burst into tears and ran screaming to my mom. My mom thought I'd hit my sister, and was so angry that she punched me in the eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46141) - you deserved it (13114)
On 05/26/2009 at 12:38am - kids - by tsakashvili (man) - United States (Iowa)
Today, was my sister's and dad's birthday. I accidentally mixed up the gifts I got for them and my dad ended up with a vibrator. He wasn't very happy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12635) - you deserved it (7620)
On 05/25/2009 at 11:04pm - misc - by silvercity09 (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I was at a fancy restaurant. I was drinking some water when I noticed a hot guy eating alone at another table waving at me. I smiled back, but had forgotten to swallow the water so it dribbled out of my mouth all over my shirt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13747) - you deserved it (31386)
On 05/25/2009 at 9:25pm - love - by Droolgirl (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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