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About Amcc11 : Blerg...
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yesterday I was proud when I startd a confrontation with my best friend's brother because he is a sexist pig who treats women like crap. Six hours later my pride was gone: I made him an after-sex sandwich. FML
TADAY AT WORK AT A FARM, WE GOT A NEW CALF. IT LOOKD LIKE IT HAD TO POOP, BUT WAS HAVING DIFFICULTY. ABOUT FOUR HOURS LATER IT STILL HADN'T POOPD. TURNS OUT IT WAS BORN WITHOUT AN ACTUAL BUTTHOLE. IT WAS THERE, JUST SEALD UP BY SKIN. I LITERALLY HAD TO CUT THIS POOR CALF A NEW BUTTHOLE. FML
Today, I went to get my car fixed. There was a vending machine in the waiting room, an I was hungry. The snack were overpriced, but I still had a little money left over. I noticed a bag of Cheeto hanging loose, so I paid 4 them, hoping to get two bags. They both got stuck. FML
TODAY, A GRL CAME UP TO ME ON THE STREET AND SAID, "YOU HAVE LYK NO SWAG, BRO." FEELING CLEVER, I SAID, "AT LEAST I HAVE A HIGH SCHOOL EDUCATION." SHE THEN TOOK OUT HER WORK ID, SHOWING ME THAT SHE WAS A SURGEON, FLIPPD ME OFF, THEN WALKD AWAY SAYING, "THIS IS TOTALLY GOING ON FACEBOOK." FML
Today, at work at a car dealership, a seemingly overzealous customer shook my hand vigorously after we finalizd a deal!! I didn't think anything of it until a coworker pointd out that he was looool just trying to make my breasts jiggle!! I'm a man!! mega FML
Today, the bar owner I work for told us to pay better attention to our drunk patrons, an to start cutting them off . A fellow bar maid askd how we are supposd to tell when it's time . He pointd at me an said, ( When they start hitting on her, they're too drunk to drive . )
I saw a folder on my son's PC named "PussyPictures". I sat him down looool for a talk , only to be told they contained pictures of the James Bond character Pussy Galore , for his essay about sexism in movies. He's now mocking me for "having a dirty mind". FML
Yesterday, I realized that the place that mah brother and I would find soggy balloon and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitute take their clients. We were blowing up used condom fir a good part of our childhood. FML
Friday 27 March 2015