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You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
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Alpaca_BAMF's favorite FMLs
by dry spell / 07/02/2013 at 12:17pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by Demotivation / 07/02/2013 at 10:35am / Germany (Berlin) / Work
by SpiderFather / 07/02/2013 at 4:01am / France / Kids
by lonely girl / 07/02/2013 at 2:47am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
by sulitak / 07/02/2013 at 2:35am / United States (Illinois) / Work
Today, I tried acid for the first time while camping with my best friend. A drunk driver smashed into my car, leaving it totaled. I had to explain the situation to a cop all while thinking my car was bleeding green ooze. FML
by Anonymous / 07/02/2013 at 1:24am / United States (California) / Transportation
Today, my boyfriend told me to completely shave off all of my already-groomed pubic area because, "It looks so unnatural." Ignoring the obvious lack of logic, I asked him why he keeps his totally ungroomed. Turns out "Men having hair is okay. Women aren't supposed to, though." FML
by yeshehaspornaddiction / 07/02/2013 at 12:37am / United Kingdom (Derby) / Intimacy
Today, my boyfriend told me that he was going to buy me a "magic wand". Being a Harry Potter fanatic, I assumed he meant a replica wand. It turns out he actually meant a Magic Wand vibrator. I was more excited about the HP wand. FML
by whorecrux / 07/01/2013 at 11:37pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy
Today, my mom signed me up for a swimming class to show my sister there's nothing to be afraid of. Considering I'm 17, I assumed I'd be in an advanced class. Instead, I get to spend summer blowing bubbles in the shallow end with four-year-olds as my little sister cheers me on from the steps. FML
by AwkwardPotato / 07/01/2013 at 10:37pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had to explain to a coworker that "the little red X" next to the email title she's been pushing out of curiosity is actually the delete button. Then, I had to restore the dozen emails she'd deleted even after I told her to stop. She's a manager. I stock shelves for a living. FML
by Anonymous / 07/01/2013 at 5:14pm / United States (Illinois) / Work
Today, I was working as a nurse, and an elderly man had just passed away. As the patient's wife was leaving she said, "Thank you for taking such good care of my husband." Then I, intending to say "Sorry for your loss," said "Thank you for your loss." FML
by Anonymous / 07/01/2013 at 4:35pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work
by Anonymous / 07/01/2013 at 2:03pm / United States (New York) / Love
by Anonymous / 07/01/2013 at 1:49pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 07/01/2013 at 12:10pm / United States (Utah) / Animals
Today, while waitressing, I had a huge party. When everything was said and done I saw the tip they left me. It said on a napkin, "You're pretty. You can't put a value on a compliment." And that was it. I wish compliments paid the rent. FML
by Chellybelly92 / 07/01/2013 at 11:34am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Money
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, a week after dropping my car off for the third time in a month at the dealership because of…