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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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Allymeme

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Allymeme
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 602
  • Number of comments : 165
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

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Allymeme's last visitors

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Allymeme's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Allymeme's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that my dad makes me wear dresses and skirts not because I look pretty in them, but because he was sick and tired of people asking him if I was a boy or a girl. FML

#16605996 (155)

I agree, your life sucks (30723) - you deserved it (4092)

On 06/11/2011 at 2:27am - misc - by mbesameh (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my fiance, the love of my life, informed me that he proposed because he was sure I'd say no. He was hoping it would lead to our breakup. FML

#16605468 (115)

I agree, your life sucks (16006) - you deserved it (1090)

On 06/11/2011 at 1:47am - love - by Username - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went to the movies with my boyfriend. As we got to the ticket booth, a couple of girls queued behind us. My boyfriend graciously introduced me as his little sister, and invited the girls to join us. We've been together for two years. FML

#16599837 (355)

I agree, your life sucks (17929) - you deserved it (2142)

On 06/10/2011 at 7:42pm - love - by sherryberry2013 - United States

Today, I'm trying to come up with a plausible explanation for my co-workers as to why I have stitches in my face. I'm not sure I want to admit that I was clawed by a pigeon as I opened my garage door. FML

#16599419 (163)

I agree, your life sucks (21049) - you deserved it (2441) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 06/10/2011 at 7:07pm - misc - by Anonyme - France (Rhone-Alpes)

Today, my dog surprised everyone by somehow managing to climb on the roof. I followed him up and spent the next hour trying to catch him. FML

#16597604 (103)

I agree, your life sucks (8255) - you deserved it (1212)

On 06/10/2011 at 4:39pm - animals - by crazydog (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I snuck up on my girlfriend to give her a kiss. Only after I planted a big one did I realize it was not my girlfriend, or even a girl for that matter. FML

#16596385 (263)

I agree, your life sucks (16568) - you deserved it (34002)

On 06/10/2011 at 3:06pm - love - by gabxoxo03 - United States (New York)

Today, I was given a new nickname at work due to my boss always confusing me with one of my co-workers who is taller than me. Someone suggested he just call us the same name to make it simpler, and the tall one would be big and the short one little. Everyone at my job now calls me Little Dick. FML

#16591385 (223)

I agree, your life sucks (31124) - you deserved it (3085)

On 06/10/2011 at 4:09am - work - by lilben (man) - United States (California)

Today, I met my soon-to-be step mother. My dad was right, we had a lot in common. Including our birth year. FML

#16589535 (165)

I agree, your life sucks (42029) - you deserved it (2614)

On 06/10/2011 at 1:17am - misc - by stepsister - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out that as a supervisor, if you reprimand a female worker and end the conversation with "Now get back to making sandwiches." your boss will consider it sexism and suspend you. I work at Subway. FML

#16589228 (151)

I agree, your life sucks (40103) - you deserved it (5476)

On 06/10/2011 at 1:01am - work - by MakeMeASandwich (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, as I was sleeping I heard something bang on my door. I walked on my balcony only to find my boyfriend throwing rocks trying to wake me. He didn't see me and threw a rock right into my eye. FML

#16589180 (104)

I agree, your life sucks (26844) - you deserved it (3424)

On 06/10/2011 at 12:59am - love - by ouchmyeye (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my girlfriend and I were making out in a motel room. Just before we really got started I noticed that I forgot to close the drapes. Once I got up to close them I saw 3 maids and the manager run away. FML

#16588229 (135)

I agree, your life sucks (24068) - you deserved it (8526)

On 06/10/2011 at 12:08am - intimacy - by henry feingold - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, on my way home from work, I decided to bring my pregnant wife a bouquet of roses to surprise her. Her response? "Why didn't you get me something useful, like chicken wings, instead?" FML

#16583514 (298)

I agree, your life sucks (29857) - you deserved it (6707)

On 06/09/2011 at 7:23pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I put lemon juice in my hair as a cheap and easy way to get highlights. I left it in my hair and I laid out in the backyard to get some sun. The sunshine wasn't the only thing that found me; it seems every bug in the neighborhood is now hiding in my hair. FML

#16580988 (296)

I agree, your life sucks (3895) - you deserved it (14161)

On 06/09/2011 at 4:32pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (New Mexico)