Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Alihb

Search for a member

Alihb

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 441
  • Number of comments : 131
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Alihb : No post on Sundays

Alihb's page activity

Visits<b>mollypop35</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 10:13am<b>mollyjynxjax</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 5:47pm<b>Peck_Kcep</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 1:34pm<b>nyriese</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 12:33am<b>Yogibob</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 11:07am<b>papashaan</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 4:52pm<b>jamiecat</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 2:50pm<b>ThoranSlock</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 7:22am<b>bas504</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 8:30pm<b>Death_The_Kid15</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 4:15pm<b>arrowhead532</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 8:05am<b>ckcknight</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 7:28am<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 1:58pm<b>Googolman</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 9:39pm<b>jacxiaojie</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 5:38am<b>GoatInABag</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 9:35pm<b>Noah98</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 11:45pm<b>ThatSlappinBass</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 8:00pm

Alihb's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of Alihb's badges

Alihb's favorite FMLs

Today, I really needed to be cheered up a bit after having had a horrible, depressing weekend. Luckily the guy I've been dating for some time, and who I really like, invited me over for dinner. Apparently, he wanted to see me so he could tell me he thinks we should stop seeing each other. FML

Today, my husband and I had some bath time to ourselves. After having sex, he decided to put bath salts in my vagina to spice things up for the next round. It's been twenty minutes out of the bath and it still feels like there are pop rocks in my vagina. FML

#21101391
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43304) - you deserved it (32135)

On 03/31/2014 at 10:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend dragged me to the local McDonald's, refusing to drive me home until he ate. When I mentioned how dangerous that part of town is, he stopped and went all Walter White on me in front of everyone, spouting lines like "I AM the danger" and "I'M the one who knocks, babe." FML

#20840638
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35971) - you deserved it (5502)

On 08/16/2013 at 5:33pm - misc - by that's methed up, darling (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I gave my daughter the sex talk. Barely 10 minutes later, her public Facebook status read: "My mom's a total pedo." and after she mentioned the talk, her friend posted, "That's sexual harassment. You can sue for that." Clearly I've failed as a parent. FML

#20840603
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50715) - you deserved it (5595)

On 08/16/2013 at 5:05pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I gave my daughter the sex talk. Barely 10 minutes later, her public Facebook status read: "My mom's a total pedo." and after she mentioned the talk, her friend posted, "That's sexual harassment. You can sue for that." Clearly I've failed as a parent. FML

#20840603
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50715) - you deserved it (5595)

On 08/16/2013 at 5:05pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my friends thought it would be fun to change my dad's name on my phone to my girlfriend's name. Guess who got an erotic text message when standing next to me while in the line to buy groceries. FML

#20826589
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47482) - you deserved it (8742)

On 08/08/2013 at 12:43am - misc - by AnnoyedByFriends -

Today, it was my first day at my new job. I had to break up two fistfights, then leave work early with a black eye. This is not what I had in mind when I applied to work at a retirement home. FML

#20820605
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47983) - you deserved it (3482)

On 08/04/2013 at 4:51pm - work - by x_o (man) - Hungary (Gyor-Moson-Sopron)

Today, the guy whose son I babysat for six hours straight confessed to being broke, then actually asked if he could pay me with sex instead. FML

#20797604
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51523) - you deserved it (3904)

On 07/22/2013 at 1:47pm - work - by nowimbroketoo (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was at Walmart. A guy in a mobility scooter bumped into me, then told me to "get the fuck out of the way." When I told him to watch his mouth, he got up and shoved me into a shelf. Just a few minutes prior, he'd yelled that he was paralyzed from the waist down. FML

#20797503
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47066) - you deserved it (3183)

On 07/22/2013 at 12:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: