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AliSama

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AliSama

9Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 1 January 1976 (39 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 91488
  • Number of comments : 336
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About AliSama : I am. I am a student of law. I am a paralegal and a comic book colorist by trade. I love and support all. be the change you want to see in the world and trust people to follow.

AliSama's page activity

Visits<b>jsb1426</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 1:37pm<b>LevyLove</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 3:51pm<b>Pan122</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 12:29am<b>ScarredFlame</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 2:58pm<b>maemismile</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 1:22am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 3:50pm<b>paigexox0</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 7:37am<b>SayakaxOue</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 12:17am<b>BestOrginalName</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 9:18pm<b>iluvmonkeys</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 6:16pm<b>dom_g</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 11:24pm<b>Tyriel</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 8:47am<b>raven83</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 12:45pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 9:05am<b>qwertsarecool122</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 9:57pm<b>kaed</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 3:07pm<b>horseh</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 11:40pm<b>danthehuman</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 6:51pm

Fucked!<b>iluvmonkeys</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 12:16am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 3:05pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 12:59am<b>supereagle</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 12:03am<b>UltraAlphaFusion</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 7:02pm<b>naTOtheBILL</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 6:53pm<b>crayzee4rph</b> - the 12/31/2014 at 7:38am<b>whiteangel361</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 5:14am<b>ragingatheist</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 2:52pm

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AliSama's favorite FMLs

Today, I decided to ask my girlfriend of 3 years to marry me. I made brownies with walnuts and put an engagement ring into the brownie I gave her. Not only did she choke on the ring, but on the way to the emergency room, I find out she is highly allergic to walnuts. FML

#651066
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31951) - you deserved it (78521)

On 03/27/2009 at 9:10pm - love - by Jim (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I gave a campus tour to a group of high school seniors. As I was showing off the dorms, one student asks, "Are these beds sturdy enough for threesomes?" Before I could respond, another kid shouts, "How would he know, I bet the only action he gets in bed is from his left hand." She's correct. FML

#553783
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (101398) - you deserved it (10833)

On 03/23/2009 at 2:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my little 7 year old brother asked me what horny meant whilst in the car with my parents. When I wouldn't tell him what it meant he screamed, "I'm getting horny!" at the top of his lungs, and told my parents that I told him to say it. FML

#525590
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63765) - you deserved it (6775)

On 03/21/2009 at 11:38pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, one of my co-workers invited me to a cookout at her house with some other people from my new job. She said to wear my suit. Assuming she had a pool, I showed up in a bikini, only to find everyone else wearing business attire and staring at me like I had lost my mind. FML

#520229
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22618) - you deserved it (63530)

On 03/21/2009 at 10:36pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I got a phone call saying I was no longer a bridesmaid for a wedding in June. It's my mom's 4th wedding. I'm getting replaced by our dog. FML

#400930
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (204161) - you deserved it (16957)

On 03/16/2009 at 10:41pm - animals - by Noname - United States (California)

Today, I was teaching a swimming lesson to 6-7 year old boys and girls. I recently broke up with my boyfriend so I haven't been taking care of my bikini line. While I was demonstrating how to do a whip-kick out of the water one of the boys said, "You have a beard coming out of your bathing suit!" FML

#333311
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38812) - you deserved it (64843)

On 03/14/2009 at 10:27pm - kids - by superfkd (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my Christian boyfriend of six months broke up with me. I had told him when we started dating that I was an atheist, and he just now decided to look up what it is. He gave me a bible. FML

#320737
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69927) - you deserved it (16403)

On 03/14/2009 at 12:48pm - love - by Noname (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I needed money to go to the movie. I asked my mom if I could reach in her purse and grab a few bucks. When I opened up her purse her phone started to vibrate. I yelled over to my mom that her phone was ringing. She said the phone was next to her. I looked in the purse. It was a vibrator. FML

#308282
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64723) - you deserved it (4681)

On 03/13/2009 at 7:04pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, in a very crowded public restroom at a sporting arena, after looking to the man using the urinal to his right, my 6 year old son turns to address me on his left and exclaims, "Daddy, that man's wiener is a lot bigger than yours!" The whole bathroom heard and looked immediately at me. FML

#221148
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67966) - you deserved it (3981)

On 03/05/2009 at 8:51pm - kids - by SadDad - United States (Florida)

Today, I got my eyebrows waxed for the first time in a few months. Once she finished, she handed me the mirror and asked, "How does it feel to look human again?" FML

#194901
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44007) - you deserved it (11397)

On 03/03/2009 at 11:51am - misc - by bluedevil26 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was meeting friends for dinner at an Indian restaurant. I was waiting for the group to arrive and our table to be ready. An Indian man approached me smiling, so I said "We're not ready for our table yet". Then I realized it was my friend's boyfriend who I've met several times. FML

#181594
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9457) - you deserved it (63802)

On 03/02/2009 at 9:22am - misc - by neelloc83 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was introduced to my boyfriend's family at their family reunion for the first time. As I sat on the couch, his 4-year old sister comes in and jumps onto my lap. For a moment I was happy to think his sister liked me, only to hear her say "You're fat! I like fat things." FML

#159579
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51420) - you deserved it (5194)

On 02/28/2009 at 5:52am - misc - by Judiee (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was walking through the mall with my boyfriend of a year and a half. There was sign outside of the jewelry store that said, "Engagement Rings-No interest for 12 months." I said, "Look, baby! No interest." He replied, "That's right...NO INTEREST." FML

#151605
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24734) - you deserved it (46459)

On 02/27/2009 at 10:18am - love - by Ma.Sa.La. (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I went to the hair salon to cut 6 in. off my hair. When I got there I decided to get my upper lip waxed for the first time. When my boyfriend came to pick me up for our date I asked if he noticed anything different about me, the first thing he said was "I see you got rid of you mustache." FML

#115837
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44506) - you deserved it (9906)

On 02/23/2009 at 6:09pm - misc - by hey-o (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I arrived at my parents house for dinner. When I got there, I noticed that they had gay pride flags hanging from the porch, and gay rights bumper stickers plastered to their cars. There was also a huge "We accept you, Nick" banner hanging from the garage. I'M NOT GAY! FML

#108815
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84851) - you deserved it (5654)

On 02/22/2009 at 10:04pm - misc - by Nick (man) - United States (New Jersey)



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