About AliSama : I am. I am a student of law. I am a paralegal and a comic book colorist by trade. I love and support all. be the change you want to see in the world and trust people to follow.
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AliSama's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 08/05/2011 at 9:47pm / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
Today, I took my new boyfriend to a family dinner. Despite having made everyone agree to be on their best behavior, my grandma spewed obscenities such as "fuck me sideways, aren't you a catch?" and "you just can't pull ass like that at my age" throughout. FML
by moonstone15 / 08/05/2011 at 8:24pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy
Today, I went into a crowded store and tried out a blazer. I was thinking to myself how hot I looked in it when the manager tapped me on the shoulder and politely said, "Excuse me sir, that's a ladies' blazer." FML
by Fred / 08/05/2011 at 1:45am / Japan / Miscellaneous
Today, the guy I've had the biggest crush on came to my house to pick me up for our first date. As we were leaving, my father screams out "Do you still have diarrhea?" I don't have diarrhea. My dad thinks he's so funny. FML
by Anon / 08/04/2011 at 4:30am / United States (Nevada) / Love
by Tim / 08/03/2011 at 3:40am / United States / Love
Today, I went bowling with my parents. This cute guy works there and he always flirts with me. My mom just so happened to see it today. As we left, she says to him "You know she's 13, right?" I'm 17. FML
by Michelle / 08/03/2011 at 2:01am / United States (Maryland) / Love
Today, my old neighbor pelted me with apples when I walked out the door. I ducked for cover and asked what her problem was. She yelled, "You took fresh peas from my garden!" I looked at her garden, only to see my dad tiptoeing back to our lawn, laughing and holding a bag full of peas. FML
by scully11 / 08/02/2011 at 2:36pm / Canada (New Brunswick) / Miscellaneous
Today, I decided to play with my dog. I sat on the ground and whistled for him to come to me. I smiled when I saw him running at my happily. He sniffed me, turned around, lifted his leg and peed on me. FML
by Username / 08/02/2011 at 1:35pm / United States / Animals
by jared77 / 08/02/2011 at 12:26pm / United States (Texas) / Transportation
Today, it was a warm day out so I left my car windows slightly open while I was at work. One of the local bums apparently thought this was a perfect opportunity to use my open driver's side window as a barf receptacle. FML
by Username / 08/02/2011 at 3:55am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Username / 08/02/2011 at 2:46am / United States / Miscellaneous
by ohcrap / 08/02/2011 at 12:58am / United States (Colorado) / Kids
by OhDeary / 08/01/2011 at 4:18pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
by burn / 08/01/2011 at 4:05pm / United States (Florida) / Kids
by anonymous / 07/28/2011 at 1:39am / United States (New Jersey) / Kids
- 1Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 2Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…