About AliSama : I am very insane^_-
I plan to rule the world and end world hunger, ensure everyone has the right to live their lives the way they want to.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Perfectionist
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
Today, my parents met my girlfriend for the first time and cooked us dinner. After, I was helping clean up in the kitchen and my dad says to me, "Don't worry, you have to slay a couple of dragons before you get to the princess." and winks at me. She heard. I was going to propose to her tonight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50076) - you deserved it (2375)
On 05/03/2009 at 12:12am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, a telemarketer called for my dad. Jokingly, I said, "I haven't seen him for like five days...I'm starting to get worried," in my best child-like voice. Apparently the telemarketer called Child Protective Services. I'm 20. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11934) - you deserved it (57065)
On 04/30/2009 at 2:03pm - misc - by Telemistake (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, while working at Wendy's my boss approached me and told me the District Manager wanted to talk to me. I had been given a substantial raise the day before so I thought he was going to promote me to manager. Wrong, he told me I was being fired for eating a 99 cent cheeseburger. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38140) - you deserved it (10900)
On 04/28/2009 at 12:38am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (South Dakota)
Today, I went to a concert. They had this feature where you could send a picture of something from your cell phone and they'd put it on the big screens, so I sent a picture of myself in. When the picture came up on the screens, the entire crowd of about 4,000 people went, "Ewwww!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (62371) - you deserved it (20270)
On 04/26/2009 at 12:49pm - misc - by apparentlyugly (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, the police posted a description of the car of a child abductor. As everyone slowed down to read the billboard, I realized that the car's description and license plate were very similar to mine. After getting death stares from passengers, I got pulled over. Twice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49907) - you deserved it (1578)
On 04/17/2009 at 12:11am - misc - by eyeamcool (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was eating some left over Easter peanut MandMs at work, when I exclaimed "oh cool, they have E's on them for Easter". It took me a couple of minutes, but I eventually realized that I was looking at a regular MandM sideways. Definitely explains my coworkers' uncontrollable laughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9712) - you deserved it (55158)
On 04/16/2009 at 3:44pm - misc - by StewPit (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was running down the hallway when a door opens and hits me right on the face. I'm sitting there with my nose bleeding and a huge bump forming on my head. The guy who comes out is hugely fat, tries to help me up, trips, and falls on me. I accidentally groped his moobs while trying to push him off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57277) - you deserved it (5247)
On 04/14/2009 at 3:50am - misc - by LizLiao (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I bought a coral colored hooded sweatshirt, which my girlfriend told me was "hot". I wore it to a baseball game tonight. When it got cold I put the hood over my head, only to hear everyone behind me laugh. The back of the hood said "Boy crazy". It was a teen girls sweatshirt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14445) - you deserved it (51180)
On 04/14/2009 at 1:10am - misc - by khood (man) - United States
Today, I got 20% tints on my car. As I'm driving home, a cop pulls me over. I didn't want to ruin my new tint by opening my window, so I opened my door as the cop approached. He then pulled out his gun and yelled "GET ON THE FUCKING GROUND!" before I could explain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34513) - you deserved it (48454)
On 04/13/2009 at 3:41pm - misc - by italy1986 (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my girlfriend's friend told her she had seen me shopping with a cute girl. When I came back home my girlfriend punched me in the face and asked who the girl was. Apparently her friend didn't tell her the cute girl was my three years old niece. I lost a tooth because of that punch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (78233) - you deserved it (4126)
On 04/11/2009 at 2:36am - love - by GotPunched (man) - Finland (Western Finland)
Today, I was at IKEA with my parents. I walked away from them and later I heard the speaker of the store call my name asking me to come to the playground because my mom and dad were worried. I'm 18. FML
I agree, your life sucks (60003) - you deserved it (3335)
On 04/06/2009 at 10:12am - misc - by BrilsmurfO_O (man) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)
Today, while at work at Wendy's, a lady came through the drive-thru with her kid. As I was handing them their order, her child points to me and exclaims "mommy, I thought you weren't supposed to work at places like this when you get older". FML
I agree, your life sucks (46278) - you deserved it (7352)
On 04/06/2009 at 3:13am - work - by Frosty (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, at my job as a cashier, a man and his 3-year old son got in line. The father said, "Give this to the pretty lady," looking at me. The kid looks at me, looks at his dad, and walks over to the next cashier. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55779) - you deserved it (2778)
On 04/04/2009 at 9:07pm - kids - by Nottheprettylady (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I went to the doctor because my arm hurt. When he told me I had tennis elbow I said "that's funny I don't play tennis". Then he asked me if I had a girlfriend. When I said no he said "Well I guess we solved this one." FML
I agree, your life sucks (63649) - you deserved it (16119)
On 04/04/2009 at 12:34am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I got my long hair cut in a short pixie cut. When my five year old daughter saw me she laughed and proclaimed 'You look just like a man!'. That afternoon I got a concerned call from the school. My daughter has told everyone 'mummy has gone away, I now have two daddies!' FML
I agree, your life sucks (58145) - you deserved it (5651)
On 04/02/2009 at 12:14pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh)
Monday 17 June 2013
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