Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

AliSama

Search for a member

AliSama

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 1 January 1976 (38 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 83634
  • Number of comments : 336
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About AliSama : I am. I am a student of law. I am a paralegal and a comic book colorist by trade. I love and support all. be the change you want to see in the world and trust people to follow.

AliSama's page activity

Visits<b>deviking</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 6:05pm<b>PinkieKeen</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 10:52pm<b>DougieKong</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 9:42pm<b>alex81596</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 9:37pm<b>lil_lach</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 10:20pm<b>julesfire</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 7:40pm<b>derpina72</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 6:49am<b>Sequoya87</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 11:07pm<b>Daylightscar</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 9:31pm<b>zeriously95</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 6:16am<b>Toughsky</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 4:22am<b>Emocuttergirl</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 11:21pm<b>megwithcat</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 7:40am<b>gmangallen1</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 5:22pm<b>AlexRice</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 4:09am<b>sarahmaxine</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 12:26am<b>RoseWithThorns</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 8:25am<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 1:40pm

AliSama's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

See all of AliSama's badges

AliSama's favorite FMLs

Today, it was our 5th anniversary, so I decided to play a little joke on my girlfriend. Before I gave her the real present, an engagement ring, I gave her a gift-wrapped rolling pin instead. I ended up in the hospital. FML

#18029483
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26703) - you deserved it (17701)

On 10/20/2011 at 4:26am - love - by Awie (man) - Austria (Wien)

Today, I learned that the only reason most of my students come to lecture is that they have a running bet on how many times I say "OK" in two hours. It was 137 last week. FML

#18025254
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21572) - you deserved it (8891)

On 10/19/2011 at 6:42pm - work - by Habit - United Kingdom (Leeds)

Today, I thought I'd be helpful and pick up my Dad's car from the repairs shop for him while he was at work. So, on my own, I hopped in my car and I drove the 15 minutes out to the shop. Only upon arriving did I consider the situation I'd put myself in. FML

Today, I went to visit my grandpa. He has an easily excited dog, who barreled into my freshly broken knee. I felt my knee move out of place again. The dog chipped a tooth. We went to the vet first. FML

#17988590
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31912) - you deserved it (2667)

On 10/15/2011 at 10:02am - health - by KilteDKilleR - United States (Utah)

Today, I saw an unbelievably cute guy. He caught my eye and began to walk towards me. I adjusted myself and flashed him a smile. He came up to me, smiled back, and said "Hi, do you have a minute for gay rights?" FML

#17987408
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35860) - you deserved it (7528)

On 10/15/2011 at 2:58am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I went shopping with my mom. I went into my department and tried on some clothes. After a few minutes, there is an announcement that a child has gone missing. Staff are searching the store. I see my mom and she hugs me in tears and yells, "I found her!" I'm almost 17. FML

#17986846
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37048) - you deserved it (3122)

On 10/15/2011 at 1:13am - misc - by Ania (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my dad yelled at me for buying chunky peanut butter. He wanted smooth. Apparently he's "allergic to peanuts." I had to explain to him why his argument made no sense. FML

#17981660
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31466) - you deserved it (2225)

On 10/14/2011 at 10:41am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, in the senior class I teach, I asked my students who had traveled outside of the country, excluding Canada and Mexico. One student raised his hand and proudly stated, "Arizona". He wants to be a doctor. FML

#17980491
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28475) - you deserved it (2953)

On 10/14/2011 at 2:42am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my students took my glasses, hid them from me, and called me a turtle when I squinted my eyes trying to look for them. This carried on for about 25 minutes. FML

#17980365
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25117) - you deserved it (3556)

On 10/14/2011 at 2:09am - kids - by TurtleTeacher (man) - United States (Alaska)

Today, my dad took my phone away. This would be fine if I was 14. I'm 22 and pay for all of my own bills. FML

#17977138
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29251) - you deserved it (4235)

On 10/13/2011 at 7:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I overheard my husband talking to our 6 year-old about animals for a project. I listened, thinking it was cute, until my husband said gleefully, "Remember to say this in your project: octopuses have 8 testicles." FML

#17973930
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26561) - you deserved it (3122)

On 10/13/2011 at 8:24am - kids - by daddoesn'tknowbest - United States

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my family. It was going well until my 23 year old sister started telling him in detail about her constipation and that if she doesn't take a shit in a few days, it's going to come out of her mouth. FML

#17967494
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26991) - you deserved it (2442)

On 10/12/2011 at 1:55pm - misc - by Lauren - United Kingdom

Today, my upstairs neighbor was leaving the parking lot, and stopped to wave. I smiled and waved back, only to realize that she was saying goodbye to her cat, who was sitting in the window. FML

#17966931
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20593) - you deserved it (3116)

On 10/12/2011 at 11:41am - animals - by octoberrain - United States

Today, I was driving my eight year-old son to school when a guy cut me off, prompting me to yell "douche bag" as a reflex out of the window. Realizing my mistake, I turned to my son and told him to never, ever talk like that. His response was, "Too late, douche bag." FML

#17966458
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11722) - you deserved it (41580)

On 10/12/2011 at 8:37am - kids - by John W. (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found out it takes no special training to put a large glass marble up my nostril but may require someone with a medical degree to remove it. FML

#17965139
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5439) - you deserved it (43567)

On 10/12/2011 at 1:09am - misc - by Beaky (woman) - Canada



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: