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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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Acer1096xxx

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Acer1096xxx
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1147
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Acer1096xxx's favorite FMLs

Today, I was having trouble blowing out the last of the several candles on my bedside table. Exasperated, I blew as hard as I could, which sent hot wax from the other candles shooting into the air, all over my face and into my eyes. FML

#6310101 (83)

I agree, your life sucks (14395) - you deserved it (7879)

On 11/15/2009 at 4:23am - misc - by shiiiiit (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I decided to pay a suprise visit to my boyfriend's house. I let myself in, walked up to his bedroom and found him dancing around. In the dress I had left the other weekend. FML

#5971650 (126)

I agree, your life sucks (25344) - you deserved it (3739)

On 10/24/2009 at 8:20am - misc - by nnnaaazzz - United Kingdom (London)

Today, it's my birthday. I'm a pastry chef by profession. Not only did my family buy a cake from my bakery, I had to make it myself and inscribe it with 'Happy Birthday Dad'. The worst part is, they asked money from me to pay for it. FML

#5181062 (103)

I agree, your life sucks (33143) - you deserved it (1654)

On 09/11/2009 at 12:33am - misc - by peter (man) - Indonesia (Jakarta Raya)

Today, I was at a party and I really had to use the bathroom. There were 30-40 people talking outside the door, so I thought it would be ok to make some noise. Just as I'm about to begin having explosive diarrhea, everyone falls silent as my dad begins to pray for our meal. FML

#3882567 (104)

I agree, your life sucks (37594) - you deserved it (3571)

On 07/19/2009 at 2:52pm - misc - by Churizmo - United States

Today, I went out to a nice restaurant with my extended family. It was expensive, and when the bill came, I whispered to my brother, "We may need to make this one a Chew and Screw". When the waitress came back to the table, my five year old son decided to ask aloud "What's Chew and Screw?". FML

#3790073 (210)

I agree, your life sucks (5025) - you deserved it (41537)

On 07/15/2009 at 11:53pm - kids - by bigdaddy (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went to my friend's beautiful wedding. The only other single girl was 5 years old. She caught the bouquet. FML

#3335931 (107)

I agree, your life sucks (37639) - you deserved it (3110)

On 06/29/2009 at 2:14pm - love - by StillSingle (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while at football practice, my teammates and I were on water break. At the bus barn next to the field, a good-looking girl was washing a bus. Some of the guys started to yell pick-up lines at her from 50 yards away, and pretty soon I chime in. She turns around. It was my younger sister. FML

#3194809 (241)

I agree, your life sucks (9658) - you deserved it (47055)

On 06/25/2009 at 1:02am - misc - by nail714 (man) - United States

Today, I was sitting next to this cute guy on an airplane who I had started talking to. There was still an empty seat between us and it seemed like there weren't any more passengers boarding the plane. I then asked out loud, "I wonder if anyone will sit between us?" He replied "I hope so." FML

#3163713 (73)

I agree, your life sucks (33978) - you deserved it (7855)

On 06/24/2009 at 1:10am - misc - by Nutty (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I got myself a cool pair of colored contacts. I was wearing them while at home, so that I'll get used to them. Then I had to go to a job interview. I forgot to take them out. I went to a job interview with zebra-print eyes. FML

#3091991 (215)

I agree, your life sucks (6792) - you deserved it (45009)

On 06/21/2009 at 2:37pm - work - by creepyeyes (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that the love of my life, who I've been going out with for two weeks only, asked me out because he lost a bet. Apparently I'm the punishment for not being able to eat 10 hot dogs. FML

#3053802 (291)

I agree, your life sucks (42218) - you deserved it (7713)

On 06/20/2009 at 4:02am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)