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Abueita

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Abueita

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 2839
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Abueita's page activity

Visits<b>blueyes909</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 1:45am<b>appelflap</b> - the 04/02/2013 at 3:51pm<b>action_cats</b> - the 04/01/2013 at 9:16pm<b>BCarew5369</b> - the 01/27/2013 at 5:50pm<b>MsSoulReaper</b> - the 01/27/2013 at 5:14pm<b>SillyGirl4602</b> - the 01/27/2013 at 1:50am<b>fireflyinajar</b> - the 01/26/2013 at 8:40pm<b>CheeseTron</b> - the 01/26/2013 at 8:07pm

Abueita's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

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Abueita's favorite FMLs

today I found out tat new usband is expecting two cildren: ours , due in January , and our 16-year-old neigbor's , due in Marc. FML

Today, I bought the only cat on Earth that doesn't lyk chasing after a laser dot. Goodbye, hours of sick, sick entertainment. FML

#20026951
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12207) - you deserved it (22696)

On 08/17/2012 at 7:33pm - animals - by lonelygirl (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, while at the grocery store, I saw mah mother . I thought it would be funny to scare her by sneaking up and grabbing her ass . Not only was it not mah mom, I left the place with a ban from ever returning to that store . FML

#20024799
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7325) - you deserved it (41799)

On 08/16/2012 at 5:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was so bord that I actually read the iTunes store's terms and conditions. big fat FML

#20024681
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31406) - you deserved it (7504)

On 08/16/2012 at 3:50pm - misc - by cardsftw - United States (California)

2day I was at te mall wen a guy startd screaming at is buddy fir sleeping wit is sister . It was pretty ilarious so wen e stormd off I mockingly yelld "Pussy!" He ten wrld around and beat te absolute ell out of is friend . Now I feel like I'm going to riencarnate as a turd . FML

#20011677
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6480) - you deserved it (47022)

On 08/09/2012 at 3:51pm - misc - by feelsterrible (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today I found out y I can't sleep at night!! My wife switchd mah sleep aid pills with energy pills!! FML

#20007763
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23717) - you deserved it (2117)

On 08/07/2012 at 1:59pm - love - by Blackfell - United States

Today, mah daughter discoverd that her Venus Fly Trap will eat pieces of rippd-up scrap paper. Also today, I discoverd that mah daughter can't tell the difference between scrap paper an mah monthly paycheck. FML

#19998217
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26947) - you deserved it (2509)

On 08/02/2012 at 10:12am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today , my OCD boyfriend stopped mid-way through sex just to crack all ten of his knuckles after accidentally cracking one. FML

#19990567
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27922) - you deserved it (4349)

On 07/29/2012 at 9:34am - intimacy - by anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today I had to turn down an offer of wat seemd like some sexy time with a cute girl because my intestines were bursting with an intense desire to unleash molten lava. I rushd home to squat looool down only to let out a disappointingly small piece of crud an a tiny fart. FML

#19984638
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29746) - you deserved it (5365)

On 07/26/2012 at 1:39am - intimacy - by Jarman (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I returned home to parents house, drunk!! Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls!! Five hours later, mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen!! In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge!! FML

#19959363
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11444) - you deserved it (38208)

On 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by Bontempi (man) - France

2day I was using a penis pump fir the first time . It was awesome until it sucked mah left testicle into the tube . I'll be singing soprano fir ahile now . FML

#19949637
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12180) - you deserved it (40105)

On 07/17/2012 at 11:32am - intimacy - by tuggernuts (man) - United States

Today, I spoke to ma ormonal pregnant wife about babby names. I told er I liked te name ( Tabita ), an se went into a full rage about ow all letters ave textures, colours an emotions an ow T is an evil letter. Apparently it's orange, plastic, an a needle trying to stab er eyes out. real FML

#19913255
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27770) - you deserved it (3769)

On 07/09/2012 at 3:31am - kids - by LNamesOnly (man) - Australia

Today... I'm Going To Court To Give An Eyewitness Account Of A Robbery. Unfortunately... I Had A Wacky Dream Last Night Concerning The Robbery... And No Longer Have Any Idea Of Wat Actually Happened In Real Life. FML

#19884306
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30302) - you deserved it (3302)

On 07/03/2012 at 2:22am - misc - by Dreamer (man) - United States (California)

Today, my husband put some photos of our wedding on Facebook. He namd the album "FML". FML

#19832174
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29283) - you deserved it (3073)

On 06/23/2012 at 1:17am - misc - by blah56 - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I walkd in on my wife masturbating . Naturally, I askd er if se needd some elp . Se replid, "Na, I've got tis." mega FML

#19783126
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27359) - you deserved it (15842)

On 06/13/2012 at 5:30pm - intimacy - by Steve (man) - United States (Louisiana)



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