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19eightyeight's favorite FMLs
by MissPerspirent / 09/27/2011 at 10:18pm / Canada / Health
by Alexandra / 09/20/2011 at 4:25am / Lebanon / Intimacy
Today, my house was raided for drugs. I had to find out my father is a drug dealer. The cops then told me this wasn't their first time here, but it was the first time I was home to see it. They said it was nice to finally meet me. FML
by thehumanshield / 08/05/2011 at 4:41am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by sofargone420 / 07/29/2011 at 10:27am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, already knowing that my girlfriend wanted to be "just friends", I invited her over, hoping to change her mind. She was playfully drawing on me with a pen when I noticed she'd written "Emily's property" on my leg. I said "Aw, I'm yours?" She then drew a for-sale sign on me. FML
by John / 07/20/2011 at 12:38pm / United States (Illinois) / Love
by Jackie Campbell / 07/12/2011 at 3:14am / United States (Colorado) / Love
by Unknown / 07/07/2011 at 11:12am / United States (Missouri) / Holidays
by asianlover / 06/30/2011 at 3:24am / Finland (Western Finland) / Miscellaneous
by redhanded / 05/28/2011 at 5:24am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy
Today, I went on a blind date at a fancy restaurant. My date was running a bit late, so I went ahead and got a table. I got bored, so I decided to ask my waiter how I looked. He stood there, then said that "it's against company policy to mock customers to their face." FML
by BurnedByAWaiter / 05/24/2011 at 9:59am / Miscellaneous
Today, my doctor told me my asthma was being triggered by my dad's smoking. He wrote a note to my dad, asking him to refrain from smoking while around me. My dad took one look at the note, then threw it in the trash, saying the doctor "doesn't know what he's talking about." FML
by Wtf / 04/29/2011 at 12:09pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health
by omg / 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids
by verasam01 / 02/24/2011 at 7:37pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals
Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by creating an account on Runescape; his favorite game. After finding him in-game, I started talking to him, not revealing who I was. After a while, I asked him if he had a girlfriend. He promptly said no and asked me for nude pics. FML
by Samyett / 02/09/2011 at 2:22pm / United States / Love
Today, my boyfriend and I were playing around. He threw me over his shoulder and turned around, smacking my face against the wall. Then he smacked my head into the fridge after turning round to see "what that loud bang" was. FML
by anonymous / 12/18/2010 at 4:11am / United States (South Carolina) / Love
- Today, I drove an hour to take my gf to a restaurant she wanted to try. After the food arrived, she… Today, at 1:19am I was woken by my cat who brought me a mouse to my bedroom. He hadn't yet killed… Today, after weeks of being stuck in the butthole of military posts, having survived spending weeks…