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The all-time greatest FMLs

Cruel kids

By Anonymous - 02/11/2025 20:00

Today, my 7-year-old daughter squeezed her hamster's balls. She squeezed so hard that they literally popped out. She said that her older sister (who is 14-years-old) convinced her to do it. Both girls are grounded and have their cell phones and TV taken away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 385

You deserved it 132

Let it out

By Depressed af - 06/02/2026 09:00

Today, I'd built up the courage to talk to my doctor about anxiety, even rehearsing what to say. When she asked, “So what brings you in today?” I immediately burst into tears, said, “I don’t know,” then apologized for crying. She handed me tissues and said, “This happens a lot,” which somehow made me cry harder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 385

You deserved it 106

Gambit

By Chess'nt - 03/09/2024 06:00 - United States

Today, after a couple days of taking lessons after I decided to learn to play Chess as a hobby, I felt a bit better about my skill level than I was before. Then I got absolutely humbled by five different people. One of them actually said to me, "What Glass Joe is to Punch-Out, you are to chess." It's hard to not be discouraged after that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 385

You deserved it 135

Overload

By Anonymous - 03/04/2025 00:00 - Philippines - Addition Hills

Today, I was supposed to have a therapy session for my anxiety about work, but it got cancelled. My boss has been berating me for 2 weeks about my performance as a newbie. I feel like she doesn't like me and it's messing with my work even more. I'm dreading going to work tomorrow with the same problem. I can't get fired again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 141

Instagram Fail

By FML Approved - 27/10/2017 20:30

Such a poser.

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 348

You absolure freak

By Frederik - 12/11/2025 03:00

Today, I woke up to my roommate glaring at me. Apparently, I was sleep-talking again, but last night I apparently shouted, “You’ll never find the bodies!” multiple times. He’s been sleeping with his door locked since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 110

Paralysed

By Worthless - 16/12/2025 22:00

Today, I sat on the sofa for eleven hours, paralyzed with anxiety. When my husband got home, nothing was done. We ate cold sandwiches off paper plates. Now he has to catch up on everything and I feel so useless I could just cry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 245

Physical imbalances in the root chakra

By Anonymous - 21/07/2024 20:00 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, I was practicing yoga at home when I heard a loud crash. My cat had managed to knock over a bookshelf while attempting to catch a fly. In my rush to save my books and knick-knacks, I tripped over my yoga mat and fell into the mess. My cat got the fly though, so that's something. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 122

Unilateral decision

By Why - 16/11/2025 22:00

Today, my husband enrolled our daughter for a dance event, even though I was against it. I told him before he enrolled that I couldn't take her to practice or the event in this cold, as I can't drive while he's driving our car. He went for a trip with his friends, so guess who's standing in the cold outside dance practice… FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 103

Since when has that been there?

By Michelle - 19/12/2020 08:01

Today, I thought something was wrong with my car battery because my dashboard lights were really low. I paid $77 to find out the dimmer switch was turned down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 880

Job performance

By AZlan - 10/03/2025 15:00 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was in a long meeting and desperately needed to fart. I carefully tried to release it slowly, but of course, it was the loudest fart I've ever made. Just after it happened, my boss looked at me and said, “That's the best contribution you've ever made in one of these meetings.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 353

Curb your curb

By Anonymous - 07/04/2025 09:00 - United States - Boulder

Today, on my way out of a coffee shop, I tripped over a curb while holding a full cup of coffee. The coffee flew in slow motion, hitting a stranger right in the face. As I stood there, frozen, I realized the puddle of coffee was now surrounding both of us. All I could do was apologize while trying to avoid a public fistfight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 104

TMI, DUDE!

By Anonymous - 16/10/2022 10:00

Today, it might be the day I ask my wife to peg me. Hope it goes well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 1 304

Doggy dog world

By No way, dog - 01/10/2025 00:00

Today, I bent down to pick up my dog’s mangled tennis ball at the park. At the exact same moment, someone’s Great Dane ran full speed into me from behind, knocking me face-first into the mud. My dog then ran off with another family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 91

I'll just order an Uber…

By Anonymous - 30/07/2025 20:00 - United Kingdom

Today, our third date went so well, we went straight back to her place, tearing each others clothes off. It was only afterwards I noticed what a shithole her house was. Clothes and mess everywhere, broken furniture, overflowing cat litter boxes. I could even smell her unwashed bedsheets on my skin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 211

Superhero stuff

By jfc - 18/08/2025 00:00 - Netherlands - Amsterdam

Today, I bumped into the bitchy mean girl who bullied me mercilessly throughout high school, leaving deep emotional scars. When I told my boyfriend who she was, he picked her up, carried her out of the store, and threw her into a puddle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 238

Time to flee the crime scene

By Anonymous - 22/10/2022 10:00

Today, my date from the night before let me stay behind when he had left for work. While relaxing, I figured I'd be fine to let a little fart out. Unbeknownst to me, not eating enough food over the past few days turned the contents of my bowels to liquid. I sharted on their bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 910

Cyclist's drip

By buyouyou - 28/08/2021 06:01 - China - Beijing

Today, I cycled to the office in my new uniform pants. When I arrived an hour later, my sweat had already soaked through them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 876

Shame!

By Anonymous - 24/08/2024 00:00 - Slovenia - Ljubljana

Today, I had a doctor's appointment. When I got there they informed me that it was indeed on August 21st, but 2025. I showed up a year early. The embarrassment and awkwardness was probably felt by the people in the next building as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 133

You probably can say them here

By A little help - 15/01/2024 00:00 - United States - Little Rock

Today, I went on a few websites to ask for donations for a cheap car part, due to my husband not able to work due to COVID, and we live paycheck to paycheck. I've never had so many only negative comments basically calling me a piece of crap and other words I can't say on here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 480

Bulked up

By Angie - 06/01/2026 09:00

Today, my mother-in-law invited herself to my house to cook lunch. I'm postpartum, depressed, and nursing a two-week old. She fed me four small shrimp and a handful of macaroni. This is what I'll be eating for a month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 79

A bit late for that

By Anonymous - 25/07/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, I realized that my only chance of being promoted was if I moved to a bigger city… twenty years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 127

Quality family time

By Brother_Out_2024 - 08/05/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, I’m on a highly undesired family vacation with my sisters and their spouses. One sister can’t stop attacking her husband‘s short comings, and the other is having an anxiety attack her wife is woefully unprepared to deal with. Better you than me, Cuñados. FML

I agree, your life sucks 383

You deserved it 101

Enjoy yourself, it's later than you think

By Anonymous - 14/05/2026 09:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my moms are driving me mad. My biological mom, a therapist, keeps telling me I need to try new things because life is short. My non-biological mom, a doctor, keeps telling me everything new I want to try has health risks that will shorten my life even further. FML

I agree, your life sucks 383

You deserved it 75

Long ass

By Anonymous - 17/12/2023 06:00 - United States

Today, I went to the market and I was stuck in a long ass line for 10-15 minutes. To make things worse, in front of me was a guy bending down with his buttcrack all the way out. I couldn't eat anything after that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 383

You deserved it 222

Money ain't everything

By Anonymous - 03/03/2024 12:00 - United States - Sparrows Point

Today, I found out my husband's new income since leaving his old job. He decided to leave a $130,000 job for a $47,000 job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 383

You deserved it 486

Soooooooo late 2020

By Anonymous - 17/05/2024 09:00 - United States - Van Nuys

Today, I might have Covid and this weekend is my birthday weekend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 383

You deserved it 127

Looksmaxxing

By Anonymous - 06/03/2026 15:00

Today, I accidentally gave myself a black eye. I would laugh about it if my friends didn't start suspecting that my husband is abusing me, and won't listen when I try to explain what really happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 383

You deserved it 79

Mystery box

By why - 11/06/2025 22:00 - Netherlands

Today, I cleaned out my filthy car. I found an odd, unlabeled tin under the seat, and opened it out of curiosity. It sprayed stinking juice everywhere and filled the house with a horrifying smell. It was Surströmming, half rotten fish, that someone must have stuck in as a prank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 383

You deserved it 246

Uranus

By Anonymous - 28/04/2024 06:00 - United States

Today, my body couldn't seem to decide whether I had constipation or diarrhea, so it decided to split the difference by making me push my turd out painfully for ten minutes, then let me go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 383

You deserved it 75

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The Top

Today, my sister and I were planning a trip to get away from things and visit some faraway friends. My dad then decided to insert himself into our plans. He got mad when we said no, and couldn't understand why we wanted to go by ourselves. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 835

You deserved it 2 570

Today, I got fired from my job at an age care facility because I was too nice to my residents. My boss told me "They're deaf, blind and about to jump head first into the grave. We don't pay you to be kind." FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 024

You deserved it 3 072

Today, I lied to my crush telling him I can play the piano. To 'prove' it, I recorded a video on my phone of a girl playing a beautiful piece. After I sent it, I realized my mouse cursor was in the center of the page the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 400

You deserved it 62 280

Today, I took my car through the car wash. I got bored, so turned the radio on, forgetting that the aerial/antenna on the car is automatic. My car aerial is now bent at a 90 degree angle and about to fall off. The radio is half white noise, half stuff that may or may not be free jazz jam sessions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 709

You deserved it 35 352

Today, I found out that the guy I met off of Bumble, and have been seeing for the past few weeks, went to jail in 2020 for kidnapping a girl he met off Tinder. I would've be on a date with him right now had I not decided to Google him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 150

You deserved it 192

Today, I realized this holiday season is the first time in 4 years that I won't have a partner to share the holidays with. My partner of 4 years cheated on me this summer. I'm still bitter and dating is unnecessarily difficult. I wish I could just be happy alone and never feel lonely again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 599

You deserved it 159