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You do you, boo

By Anonymous - 06/10/2024 12:00 - United States - Austin

Today, I had to sit in silence at a restaurant table as my friends ripped into the Tesla Cybertruck and laughed about how "shit and cringe" it is. I was silent because I couldn't bring myself to defend it, even though I think they're pretty cool, and I actually want one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 84

You deserved it 782

Late bloomer

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Port Orchard

Today, I discovered that my 8-year old is not fully toilet trained when a turd fell out of his pants, shortly after introducing him to his new babysitter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 891

You deserved it 9 464

Cars these days…

By Kevin - 08/10/2024 12:00 - Canada - Ottawa–Gatineau

Today, my relatively new car locked down, with my keys inside of it, while it was still running. In a panic because it was getting dark and I was already low on fuel, I called a locksmith. He showed up and told me he needed to see some ID before unlocking the car. My ID was in the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 441

You deserved it 116

Outside is bad

By Anonymous - 12/05/2026 03:00 - United States - Wheeling

Today, I went outside for the first time in a week and ended up tripping over something, busting my lip and nose, and breaking a tooth. I ran away in a dazed and confused panic while dropping all my stuff. Not going outside again for a while. FML

I agree, your life sucks 301

You deserved it 155

By smallfrie32 - 23/11/2010 05:22

Today, I realized that 95% of my Facebook friends added me only because they think my sisters are hot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 207

You deserved it 4 548

Comfort

By Anonymous - 14/05/2023 00:00 - Bulgaria

Today, I got robbed in a elevator. Obviously I got scared, and I immediately called my mom to seek comfort. Instead of comforting me, she started yelling and calling me stupid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 790

You deserved it 133

Dreams

By Anonymous - 15/05/2026 03:00 - United States - Boise

Today, I woke up from a dream where I was talking with my Pa, who raised me, about my life. He and I drank coffee and talked and he told me everything will be OK. I will never talk with him again; he passed almost 59 years ago and I never got to say goodbye or tell him how much I loved him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 401

You deserved it 77

Difficult

By stressed - 12/10/2014 06:40 - United States - Statham

Today, as a restaurant manager, I had a large party of difficult guests. They sat in their private room they'd reserved for three-and-a-half hours, then caused a huge scene when it was time to pay. One guy even ran at me like he was going to hit me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 993

You deserved it 2 690

By Kolkata - 05/08/2012 23:25 - Canada

Today, my son surprised me on my birthday with tickets to a concert I really wanted to see. I was excited, especially since I planned to buy them but couldn't due to the fact it was too expensive. I was ecstatic, until I found out he'd stolen my credit card to buy them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 681

You deserved it 2 341

Accidental exposure

By trauma - 16/05/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, my three year-old son excitedly went to the window to watch the construction site next door. He does this all the time and it's adorable… at least, it was until a man got run over by a bulldozer with him watching. He screamed for hours and now cries if I don't keep the curtains closed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 513

You deserved it 72

By Anonymous - 20/11/2010 20:16 - United States

Today, I got home late after a long day at work and all I wanted to do was take a shower and go to bed. As soon as the water in the shower was hot, I got in. One minute, I was standing and the next I was fast asleep at the bottom of the tub. I woke up with my face swollen and my shoulder bruised. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 527

You deserved it 5 268

By Icci - 12/12/2009 22:54 - United States

Today, at work I was playing football with one of my camp kids in the indoor-pool. I saw a co-worker walking by and I decided to hit him with the football. The football slipped out of my hand and I hit a lady in the face, breaking her nose, and causing her to fall and get a concussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 701

You deserved it 37 860

By fuckbio - 12/12/2009 05:00 - United States

Today, after pulling an all-nighter for my Bio final at 8AM and drinking 6 sodas, 3 energy drinks, and coffee throughout the night, an hour into the exam, I had to go to the restroom, so I get permission and go. I'm 1 of 3 people. They later find a cheat sheet in the restroom. Now I'm a suspect. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 066

You deserved it 4 381

By Screwed - 26/05/2009 07:48 - South Africa

Today, I was looking online for an alternative number for the interior decorator that is making curtains for me because I couldn't get hold of him. Instead of his number I found a website warning people about him, saying he is a conman. I paid a very big deposit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 481

You deserved it 19 277

Lads being lads

By Anonymous - 17/10/2024 12:00 - United Kingdom

Today, at my local fishing tackle shop, some dumb kids got into a fight and knocked me over into a glass display case of antique fishing hooks. I’m now in hospital, not only from cuts from broken glass, but to have 27 barbed hooks removed from my hands, arms, and face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 587

You deserved it 82

Bad grandma

By Anonymous - 21/05/2026 22:00 - United States

Today, I'm grounded for literally the whole summer because my parents found out that I was still seeing my grandma behind their backs, even though they banned her from ever seeing us again after she spanked my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 379

You deserved it 128

By heartbroken - 10/07/2013 19:08 - Australia

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of over a year has been cheating on me the whole time, but that "it's just physical". However, he doesn't want to do anything "physical" with me, except cuddle when we're together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 065

You deserved it 4 726

By unlicensed - 01/08/2012 16:20 - United States - Charlotte

Today, I drove 45 minutes to take my full driver's test. At the end of the test, the instructor told me I'd done everything perfectly, but had failed before I left the parking lot. I didn't see the "one way" sign at the entrance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 217

You deserved it 9 442

By loser - 31/07/2012 14:21 - United States

Today, I found out that the only reason my guy friends actually hang out with me at my house all the time is because they think my mom is hot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 525

You deserved it 2 531

Scammers

By insurance lies - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I had to get an MRI. I double and triple checked to make sure there was no out-of-pocket cost. When I arrived at the testing center, I was expected to pay full price for the test. It costs $2,360. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 034

You deserved it 4 003

8 out 10 dentists

By Anonymous - 28/12/2020 02:01

Today, after having toothaches for about two years, which persisted even after I had the crack in my tooth repaired, I went to a different dentist and it turns out that the actual culprit is a hole in the neighboring tooth, which has had years to grow, unnoticed under the edge of my gums. FML

I agree, your life sucks 936

You deserved it 75

Big whoop

By jag talar - 07/09/2011 00:01 - Canada

Today, I came home to visit my family after a year at college. Expecting to impress them, I proudly informed them that I now speak fluent Swedish. Imagine my surprise when my mother said, "That's a useless language" and everyone agreed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 362

You deserved it 7 215

Don't rock the boat

By Anonymous - 31/05/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, I made the mistake of admitting to my husband that he was too perfect with the way he's always helping with cooking, cleaning and everything, and that it was starting to make me feel a little useless. He got mad and has now turned into the textbook definition of a lazy slob. I wish I'd kept my mouth shut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66

You deserved it 779

What am I doing?

By forever young - 05/07/2013 15:16 - United States

Today, I Googled "How to act like an adult." I'm 37. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 427

You deserved it 52 848

My pal

By Anonymous - 06/09/2011 01:03 - United States

Today, I went to visit my alcoholic father. He remembered to ask me how my dog Reggie is, but could not remember the name of "my pal." My "pal" is also my wife of four years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 068

You deserved it 2 411

Obsessed

By Anonymous - 01/06/2026 15:00 - Sweden - Stockholm

Today, my ex, whom I dumped in 2024 because she stopped caring about me or what I did, is stalking online someone I have just started dating. She went to her workplace, then called me to tell me I'm hers and she will never let "the other woman" take me from her. Not sure if I like the indifferent one or the jealous psycho less. FML

I agree, your life sucks 282

You deserved it 44

Scratch that itch

By Anonymous - 02/01/2021 04:58

Today, I bought a $50 Nintendo eShop card to redeem on my Nintendo Switch. As I was scratching the grey area, I scratched too hard, making it hard to see what it was. I tried randomly guessing and asking for help. Neither helped. Guess who didn't get $50 back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 456

You deserved it 858

FOMO FML

By Anonymous - 22/02/2022 10:00

Today, my church friends ditched me to go skiing with a bunch of jewish basketball players from another school. They said I’d "harsh the vibe" with my "principles". The photos they post online look like they’re having a lot of fun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 463

You deserved it 1 192

Overruled

By Anonymous - 28/12/2020 22:58 - Germany

Today, I told my dogs to go to their dog beds. The small dog went onto the big one’s bed. The big dog went onto my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 627

You deserved it 267

Bureaucracy

By FuckUNISA - 25/02/2022 10:00

Today, I've counted the unanswered 29 emails and 91 calls I've made to the university. The accountant at my company submitted the wrong reference number when doing the payment to the university, and now I cannot register for the course. Every time I get a response, I'm asked for info already provided. FML

I agree, your life sucks 917

You deserved it 91

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The Top

Today, my mother taught my 98-year-old great-uncle to knock on the wall if he needs us. He can't remember who we are, but every hour he can remember to knock to ask, "Is it breakfast yet?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 833

You deserved it 4 151

Today, I was on the webcam with my boyfriend. I could see that he was on the couch, and alone, so I took off my shirt and smiled, waiting to see his reaction. He smiled at me but then kept looking in another direction. I playfully asked "What's so distracting?" His answer: "History Channel". FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 479

You deserved it 10 112

Today, I had a job interview. I have a nervous tendency to rub my foot against the bar under the table. After the interview, I noticed I had been rubbing my foot against the interviewer's leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 493

You deserved it 39 359

Today, my sister has been going on and on about how sexy her new doctor is. She’s been plotting to fake an illness just to see him again. When I explained that doctors are professionals and even if he were interested it would be unethical for him to say so, she called me a fat, jealous loser. FML

I agree, your life sucks 987

You deserved it 152

Today, our teacher forgot to collect our phones when we arrived at school. We almost managed to take our phones back to the dormitory but someone's phone rang TWICE in the corridor and she remembered the whole thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 191

You deserved it 388

Today, during sex I wasn’t really into it so I was letting my mind wander and it randomly settled on my sister's birthday and how I needed to buy a gift. As my husband seemed like he was about to finish, I faked my orgasm and accidentally moaned my sister's name. He heard me, so now he’s "concerned". FML

I agree, your life sucks 107

You deserved it 538