The Top

The most agreed on FMLs The most commented on FMLs The most favorited
The top of the day The top of the week The top of the month The top of the year The all-time greatest FMLs

Noah98 tells us more.

Noah98 20

Hi, OP here. Just to clarify, my dad works third shift so this was during his time off. I simply thought it was funny that the roles seemed reversed. He does work hard to provide for us.

boobear511 tells us more.

boobear511 15

The cat was outside the door, wanting to get in.

Catlover234 tells us more.

Catlover234 4

Hi, OP here, I created an account to better explain what happened. This actually happened a few months ago. I was at the beach with some friends and didn't have the time to change out of my swimsuit when my grandpa showed up. We only took one car and the beach wasn't very far away from my grandparent's house, so my grandpa agreed to pick me up from the beach and take to my eye doctor appointment. I couldn't drive home because I was getting drops in my eyes. Some very loud girls in their late teens/early twenties saw me get in the passenger seat, pointed at me and said "She's a hooker!" loud enough for me to hear. My grandpa's hard of hearing, so he didn't hear it. I was dressed in my swimsuit like pretty much everyone else on the beach. Everything else was in my beach bag.

kfeath1 tells us more.

kfeath1 8

Wow! This is my FML and I can't get over the number of comments! What happened was my staph infection was on the inside of my body...to look at me I looked absolutely normal. I didn't handle any food, just sat people at their tables. So those of you who are judging...relax; no contamination was given. And I had a port in my arm that I had hidden, but couldn't pull my sleeve down over because it was so big. As for the lady, she just wanted something to complain about. She saw the spots where the port had been and just wanted to complain about it. My manager should have stood up for me, but he didn't and instead decided to tell me that a person complained and I needed to heed what she said. It was a ridiculous time and I'm glad I'm healthy again.

meg__1798 tells us more.

meg__1798 9

Hey guys its me OP, To clarify, my mom told me that she was planning to do this only if the Heimlich maneuver did not work. I was choking on the chip pretty badly and could not breathe so she was thinking about the worst possible scenario. Luckily, I got it out and I am fine and no throats were cut. (This time). When she told me about her (bad) plan to perform a tracheotomy I told her about the scene with Sandra Bullock in The Heat and the dangers of doing one without training (and that TV does not count as training). I also may have mentioned that I would rather choke out and die than have my throat cut open with a steak knife on the kitchen floor.... Thanks for all of your comments! -OP