Love: Today, me and my girlfriend went to the club. The song "Single...

By dumpedattheclub - 28/03/2009 03:40 - United States

Today, me and my girlfriend went to the club. The song "Single Ladies" by Beyonce came on; the DJ came on the mic and said "Single ladies raise your hands!" My girlfriend raised her hand. FML

agreeclassic 66 994

vote type 1 7 277

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By oddbrien - 13/12/2016 03:34 - United States - Baltimore

Today, while at the club, I started dancing with a girl who I had noticed throughout the night. When she turned around she firmly stated, "I'd much rather dance by myself". FML

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By intranator - 08/04/2009 21:43 - Jordan

Today, I waited in line to get into a club with my girlfriend, the bouncer only let her in, she told me to call her if I needed anything and left me. We were supposed to celebrate my birthday. FML

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By Anonymous - 07/12/2012 21:28 - United States

Today, I was out clubbing. My girlfriend went to get us drinks, so I danced alone while I waited. Some girl with hideous meth mouth, who was clearly tripping balls, started harassing and groping me and got all three of us kicked out when my girlfriend returned and beat the hell out of her. FML

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He bangs the drums

By PhilDavisDied? - this FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - France

Today, after pulling up to my girlfriend's house for dinner with her parents, one of my favorite songs begin to play on the radio. After my 3 minutes of air drumming, I look up to see my girlfriend and her parents bouncing with laughter. FML

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By Anonymous - 03/12/2011 02:02 - United Kingdom

Today, at a nightclub, a cute girl started hitting on me. I got into it and we danced. Just as she started getting frisky with me, a guy shoved me off, smacked me to the floor with a right-hook, and shouted, "That's what you get for touching my woman." FML

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Shut up

By Anonymous - 14/05/2019 20:00

Today, a girl came up to me on a club dance floor and said, “Shut up and dance with me,” like the song lyrics, only I fell over on her while dancing, and she dislocated her ankle. I don’t think this woman is gonna be my destiny after that. FML

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By therealkathl - 05/03/2015 13:32 - Austria

Today, my boyfriend convinced a girl at the club to break up with her boyfriend and go home with him. She did. Now I'm single too. FML

agreeclassic 39 325

vote type 1 3 446

By Anonymous - 14/02/2014 01:31 - United States

Today, I was out with my girlfriend at a club. As a slow dance began, a guy approached and asked, "May I cut in?" My girlfriend surprised me by saying, "Sure!" As I was about to protest, the guy cut me off and said, "Sorry miss, I was asking him." FML

agreeclassic 52 011

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By I Tried - 29/01/2016 22:18 - United States - Burton

Today, I went out clubbing and hit the dance floor, hoping to impress some girls with my moves. All I got was a bunch of weird looks and was told by one girl that I'm the "whitest black guy" she's ever seen. FML

agreeclassic 20 459

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By Anonymous - 02/02/2013 23:03 - Belgium - Schepdaal

Today, I went to a club with my girlfriend and her buddies. An hour in, I saw her making out with a guy on the dance floor, so I confronted her. She stormed off to the bar and said something to her friend, who then came over and angrily slapped me across the face. Yeah, I'm confused too. FML

agreeclassic 54 307

vote type 1 3 784

darkfaery 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 11:02

If you two are not married, then technically, she IS single. And if you don't want her to be single, then you ought to put a ring on it!

Carolaaine 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 10:47

As long as she doesn't try to kiss another boy (or boyS) you're quite safe.. It's just a song

Comments

mijzelffan 0

Friday 12 June 2009 16:03

did she mean something by that?

moosehead2 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 22:46

she was just into the music :P chillax

swimmer07 0

Friday 19 June 2009 4:39

if you like it then you shoulda put a ring on it...

LeCorsaire_fml 0

Wednesday 8 July 2009 0:25

ditch her. make her single. she asked for it.

Vampire_princess 0

Sunday 2 August 2009 5:01

That song gives me nightmares lol

violentturtle 0

Tuesday 27 October 2009 2:32

Ugh. It's just a song and she was drinking...

quietlytearful 0

Friday 1 January 2010 21:27

Oh, cry me a river. She was just dancing to the song, don't be so sensitive.

Alli137 6

Monday 25 January 2010 4:32

if you're not married you're single...put a ring on it! ;-)

taylorlynn1125 1

Monday 2 August 2010 18:39

She was probably just kidding.. I probably would've done the same thing to my boyfriend just to see his reaction..

ioceano 0

Tuesday 2 November 2010 6:58

omg ppl calm the hell down his gf was just having some fun at the club something most of you need to do....

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Today, I came out to my parents. Now my dad only refers to me as "Nancy Boy", and not in a nice way, that’s if he even bothers to speak to me at all. Mostly he just pretends I don’t exist. FML

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Today, as I was crossing an intersection, a car ran a red light and almost hit me. This kind of thing happens a lot in my town so I'm used to almost being run-down, except this time it was a small boy on his father's lap steering. The dad was laughing. FML

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Today, my husband yet again procrastinated on a project for so long, that he now has to work during the weekend. When I asked whether or not we could still spend some free time together, he started ranting about how I ruin his career. He seriously thinks it's about us and not his horrible planning skills. FML

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He bangs the drums

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