•
•
•

alygater333

0

0

7

0

229

6

Clinton, Ohio, United States
29
Sunday 29 September 1996

Alygater333

Alygater333 -

Alygater333 -

Alygater333

lovers5201

deathstrok...

Alygater333

Alygater333

oh gee - 02/05/2016 05:01

Today, my boyfriend keeps requesting that I make eye contact when I give him blowjobs. He won't let up about it. I don't know how to break it to him that his penis is too small for me to suck and look upward at the same time. FML

21 485

5 312

billjoebob424 - 19/03/2016 01:18 - Canada - Erin

Today, I walked in on my younger cousin trying to find Minecraft porn. FML

20 652

1 794

weirdoe - 07/02/2016 09:17 - Italy - Palermo

Today, the only thing that kept me hard during sex with my wife was thinking about my own naked body. FML

23 533

9 203

ugh - 03/09/2013 23:53 - United States - Lancaster

Today, I ended up taking a massive dump after being constipated for a while. I thought I was alone, so I pretended I was giving birth to my turd, and let out all kinds of sound effects. Next thing I know, I hear a knock at the door and my mom asking, "Should I call 911?" FML

25 770

40 932

dumped - 05/06/2011 05:17 - United States

Today, my five year old daughter asked me what a divorce was. When I asked why she wanted to know, she replied with "Daddy wants one. He says you can have me." FML

70 068

4 187