diesel6013

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ЗАБЕРИТЕ 1...

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Diesel6013's favorite FMLs

Compliance

By Anonymous - this FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I found out that when an officer screams, "DON'T MOVE OR I'LL TASE YOU", it really means, "If you so much as flinch I'm going to shoot and 50,000 volts will be directed through your nose and groin." FML

agreeclassic 30 337

vote type 1 12 847

By DaisyMay - 04/04/2011 19:47 - United States

Today, I returned home to find the key to my mailbox missing. I called the post office and was informed that a new key will cost me $15. I have no money, and my paycheck is in the mailbox. FML

agreeclassic 37 384

vote type 1 5 204

By anonymous - 28/03/2011 18:48 - United States

Today, I dropped my Blackberry, but thanks to the protective gel case that I just purchased for it... it bounced and fell right into a sidewalk drainage sewer. FML

agreeclassic 45 376

vote type 1 5 615

By upliftmofo - 28/03/2011 05:56 - Belgium

Today, I discovered my cat frequently licks my toothbrush. FML

agreeclassic 36 679

vote type 1 5 986

By anon - 23/03/2011 04:56

Today, I walked in on one of my housemates pissing in the kitchen sink full of dirty dishes. FML

agreeclassic 44 757

vote type 1 3 940