Today, I had sex with my girlfriend for the first time. Even after several hours I wasn't able to climax. My girlfriend now thinks that I don't like her body, and the reason I couldn't orgasm is because I don't like having sex with her. We spend the rest of the night in silence. FML
AfroFluff tells us more.
AfroFluff 23
Hello everybody, here is your Afro OP. First I want to say thank you for all the ones who gave me helpful advise, also this happened a while ago. I wanted to see what you guys write because I felt like I am doing something wrong. Thank you guys who wasn't trying to criticise my girlfriend. She did not throw a tantrum, nor was she mad. Some of you are right, she is insecure and that makes her silent. Well let me tell you guys what happened afterwards so I can calm you all down :) We had sex again and again and let me tell you I am less nervous but I am still not able to cum xD. She understands though it has nothing to do with me disliking her body, we had a calm discussion. Thank you again for everybody who was supportive, to be honest I was shy to post my first FML and I did not expect so many people to comment! I am excited for the next post I will make. Who knows what it will be. Afro is with you all!
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Top comments
cooltatgar 31
Discuss the matter, try explaining to her what really happened. That's better for your relationship.
TrippingOnAcid 29
I'm sorry for your experience OP. I'm sure she'll come round and be more understanding.
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Comments (141)
jennlody 28
Happened to my boyfriend and I too. Once I realized I had to be more understanding and he realized I wasn't disappointed, the problem was solved. good luck!
asherm 15
She sounds like she's too young if she doesn't understand that happens.
EnglandRocks 10
Sorry about that OP :/ try to explain to her that men aren't machines and that sometimes an absence of climax is not a sign of an absence of desire and love.
theperfectchild 13
Get her on birth control and go bare skin. Sometimes I can't finish when I have to use a condom. Besides. It's more fun that way anyways.
MissBehavin77 18
I can see maybe why she would feel that way but HOURS of sex? I'd say she was lucky.
Homer1975 14
hours of sex, it's Really Cool for the first time
amileah13 26
Aww poor thing. Hope your girlfriend understands, that can happen sometimes. Maybe get yourself checked out to make sure everything is okay :)
ohmyfml32117 11
Woow you suck ... Nope you didn't do that either
AfroFluff 23
What you mean?
AfroFluff 23
Hello everybody, here is your Afro OP. First I want to say thank you for all the ones who gave me helpful advise, also this happened a while ago. I wanted to see what you guys write because I felt like I am doing something wrong. Thank you guys who wasn't trying to criticise my girlfriend. She did not throw a tantrum, nor was she mad. Some of you are right, she is insecure and that makes her silent. Well let me tell you guys what happened afterwards so I can calm you all down :) We had sex again and again and let me tell you I am less nervous but I am still not able to cum xD. She understands though it has nothing to do with me disliking her body, we had a calm discussion. Thank you again for everybody who was supportive, to be honest I was shy to post my first FML and I did not expect so many people to comment! I am excited for the next post I will make. Who knows what it will be. Afro is with you all!
MzMegs 20
You're not alone in this. It's incredibly difficult to get my boyfriend to cum; I definitely don't make him cum every time even though I really would love to. Do you take any medications? It might be a side-effect if you do.
Johnnycake23 42
Could you be unknowingly homosexual? Maybe it is forbidden in your culture so you repress it and this is how it manifests itself?
AfroFluff 23
I don't take any medication. I guess its just the long time of never having sex and than the sudden change.
thespiantess 18
I have had the same issue with my boyfriend and I felt really self-conscious about my body, like I imagine what your girlfriend must have felt. It's great to get to read the other side of the story, since all I got from my BF was "I'm just really stressed out, don't worry". Thank you so much for sharing, OP! It was so helpful :)
ekim300 26
How about trying out some stimulants? Some condoms have gel already included. If not, there are plenty of other stimulants out there that should help you I'm sure.
AfroFluff 23
No problem ^^
sturschaedel 27
Are you able to ****** when you are pleasuring yourself? If so, and if your girlfriend is up to it, you could show her and teach her how to touch you. Maybe that way she could finish you off after she is done?
Meechiepie 13
my spouse was never able to go with a condom, but without them it's not even a problem
TemperanceRiley 15
honestly that body can set itself t cut a certain way just keep trying
greeneyedx 23
Oh boy.. I can relate to this. When my boyfriend and I first started dating, he was a "nervous cummer." Took him 3 hours to cum for months. As we got more comfortable with each other however, it's taken him less time. So good luck!
TallMist 32
#90 That's not how it works at all. It's most definitely possible for a homosexual to cum while having sex with a woman. They may not like it, but it's totally possible.
Perry85 42
This happens to me too. Sometimes I just can't cum, no clue why, and my girlfriend always assumes it's because I'm not attracted to her. I feel your pain and hope you can figure out the cause. Have you tried seeing a doctor?
Ray_of_midnight 23
Hey, odd theory: do you use a really tight grip when you **********, and has masturbation been your only sexual outlet for a while? Because what can happen is that an extended period of using a "death grip" can desensitize your penis to other stimuli such as those from oral and vaginal intercourse. Google "masturbation death grip" for more than you ever wanted to know. The good news is, it's fixable.
thespiantess 18
I'm sorry, I know this is a serious issue, but the name "masturbation death grip" sounds really epic. It should be the name of a hardcore metal band or a powerful video game attack.
katskin12 5
I agree with your theory. My boyfriend and I had this issue when we started having sex. We were both virgins and late-bloomers so he was used to his death grip. We just kept trying and worked on figuring out what the other found pleasurable. So keep practicing (and cut down on **** and masturbating- that helped a lot)
JHPugh 19
The same happened to me my first time OP.