The Top

I booked in next week to get it looked at- hopefully it behaves until then!! It just gets super awkward because I'm a 22 year old female and so not the usual candidate for a cheeky drive by beeping!! Thanks for all your concern guys!! Xxx

By epicvixen - 15/03/2015 21:12 - Canada - Richmond

Today, while driving, I saw someone's hubcap blowing away behind me on the highway. I thought it was funny and sort of chuckled to myself. Later I realized it was my hubcap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 779

You deserved it 27 292

By Brit - 16/12/2011 08:50 - Reserved

Today, two American guys attacked me for not speaking their language. I'm from England, and they said I'm speaking my own language wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 359

You deserved it 6 870

By Anonymous - 12/02/2015 20:14 - Canada - Ajax

Today, I discovered that my male coworker, who coincidentally shares my last name, has been telling everyone we're married. I'm 26; he's 58. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 098

You deserved it 2 379

Don't come

By anonymous - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff

Today, my parents and in-laws are in a bidding war for the house next door, since we are about to have a son. We're not even sure if we want them living this close. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 469

You deserved it 1 577

By FeelingFatastic - 05/01/2015 06:08 - United States

Today, my coworker asked me if I was on a diet for my New Year's resolution. When I said no, she replied, "Why not?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 516

You deserved it 4 390

By sadness - 12/10/2012 02:48 - United States - Metairie

Today, the guy I'm dating came into the same restaurant where I was eating. He was with a girl. He sat at the table next to mine and didn't even bother to say, "Hi." I guess I'm single again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 424

You deserved it 2 294

Bedtime

By kids shouldnt have hard sports equipment - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - Australia - Woodville

Today, I was knocked unconscious by the 10 year-old I was babysitting because it was his younger sister's bedtime and he didn't want her to go. When I came to, their mother was screaming at me for sleeping on the job. In the middle of the kitchen floor. I lost a job and gained a killer headache. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 652

You deserved it 1 711

By couch girl - 25/06/2013 16:23 - Singapore - Singapore

Today, I got harassed and screamed at by a middle-aged man for parking in a spot close to the store, because he wanted the same spot so he didn't have to walk so far with his groceries. He took a photo and vowed to report me to the authorities. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 818

You deserved it 3 924

Going at it

By GiveADogABone - 15/10/2015 22:47 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were trying to get it on on the bed. As soon as things were starting to get heated, I turned over and saw that my dog had not only jumped up on the bed, but had been watching and started to hump the pillow next to our heads. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 101

You deserved it 3 534

The gift

By bubblensuds1 - 28/10/2009 04:22 - United States

Today, someone left a used condom under the windshield wiper of my car. I didn't notice it until I was driving. And it was raining. It was even tied, so the contents couldn't leak out. I'm not planning artificial insemination anytime soon, but thanks for the thought. Man, I love college. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 818

You deserved it 3 103

DIY FML

By Anonymous - 02/04/2012 03:59 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, my dad told me it would be fine to use the mounting tape he'd bought to place paintings up in my newly painted room. I did, but after deciding I wanted to move a painting and pulling it off the wall, the wall came with it. Back to square one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 913

You deserved it 5 788

By WayToGoDaddyHo - 08/07/2015 06:17 - United States - Beaverton

Today, my father lectured me for dating a man with "no future", even though he's entering a PhD program next year at a top university. Meanwhile, my dad's last relationship was with a 20-year-old hooker who ended up stealing his credit cards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 012

You deserved it 1 850

By ryzzostar - 25/05/2016 19:50 - United States - Seminole

Today, I finally got my screaming, teething, 1-year-old daughter down for a nap to hopefully get some work done. The second I opened my laptop, FedEx dropped off a package and rang the doorbell. My dog went nuts. Then my neighbor rang the doorbell to let me know I had a package. My daughter's awake now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 800

You deserved it 959

ryzzostar tells us more.

ryzzostar 16

Friday 27 May 2016 9:01

I'm OP. There has been a sign on my doorbell since I brought her home that says "IF YOU RING THIS DOORBELL YOU WIN A SCREAMING BABY", as for the dog she's been through training (several times) but she failed... but she's as good-natured as they come, and my neighbor means well, he wanted to make sure I brought in the package because there has been a lot of theft in my neighborhood lately. My daughter was very premature but never been sick so we use natural remedies over Orajel and Tylenol/Motrin, she rarely fusses about her teeth, it was just one of those days.

By chickenshit4 - 15/05/2016 00:57 - United States - Pine Ridge

Today, my 43 year old mother came home covered in hickeys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 262

You deserved it 3 097