Intimacy: Today, I overheard my mother talking to her friend, and using...

By unwanted daughter - 02/07/2014 15:54 - Canada - Oliver

Today, I overheard my mother talking to her friend, and using me as an example of how it's sometimes best to swallow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 235

You deserved it 5 862

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Same thing different taste

By Username - 29/10/2010 23:15 - France

Today, I was out eating lunch with my parents when my mom complained that I eat too quickly and don't thoroughly chew my food. My dad exclaimed, "That's because she swallows!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 711

You deserved it 5 901

By Bechara - 13/06/2011 09:11 - Pakistan

Today, I overheard my girlfriend telling her friend, "Actually, it's a good thing she died, she was quite a bitch." She was talking about my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 579

You deserved it 4 527

Highly inappropriate

By Anonymous - 27/05/2013 22:15 - United States - Lehi

Today, my in-laws came for dinner. My 5-year-old son chose that as the perfect time to say, "Good girls always swallow!" when my daughter coughed up some of her food. I have no idea where he heard it, but my mother-in-law blamed me, and my wife had to convince her not to call CPS on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 067

You deserved it 3 757

By glittercat - 26/01/2009 23:44 - United States

Today, I heard my mom moan in the other room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 328

You deserved it 3 345

Make it stop, please

By Anonymous - 27/09/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, I had to listen to my mom give a detailed description of her date last night to her friends via speakerphone... while I was trapped in the car with her. When I pointed out that I was still in the back seat, she scoffed and told me, "I have a sex life, deal with it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 486

You deserved it 137

By quietdown - 30/05/2009 19:50 - United States

Today, I began to choke on a large pill while my mom was in the room. Hoping that she would help me, I began to make a lot of noise. After she completely ignored me, I threw my body over a chair, saving my life. At this point my mother asks me to shut up because she can't hear her friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 059

You deserved it 4 766

By Anonymous - 13/11/2010 07:14 - United States

Today, I told my parents that I wanted a little brother. My dad apparently thought it would be funny to tell me that my mom just swallowed my little brother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 785

You deserved it 9 360

Me is what matters

By Anonymous - 15/08/2020 05:01

Today, my mother once again interrupted me and talked over me, as though I wasn't saying anything at all. Then she wondered why I remained quiet after she was done talking about her mother doing that. Must run in the family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 458

You deserved it 126

By PPP - 28/04/2015 15:05 - United States

Today, I overheard my mom giving my 6-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 686

You deserved it 3 343

Thanks mom

By Anonymous - 14/02/2021 14:01 - Colombia

Today, my mom decided it was a good idea to remind me about my non-existent sex life while all the family was having dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 065

You deserved it 114

cwrocker 14

Wednesday 2 July 2014 21:05

Wow, sorry OP sometimes parents speak before they think

mattiscg 22

Wednesday 2 July 2014 21:07

some people shouldn't ever be parents.

Comments

StickyPickles 33

Wednesday 2 July 2014 22:56

It would seem the best part of you did run down your moms leg. . .

Blaze248 10

Wednesday 2 July 2014 23:07

damn

Vagitarian1 10

Thursday 3 July 2014 1:09

Sometimes???

ppsycomom 7

Thursday 3 July 2014 1:19

-----GULP--------

bbshepard21 12

Thursday 3 July 2014 1:35

I wouldn't know how to respond to that.

elsuperloco68 12

Thursday 3 July 2014 1:39

gobble gobble

Fr0gs 15

Thursday 3 July 2014 2:16

I do love a girl who swallows..

festegg 6

Thursday 3 July 2014 4:27

That SUCKS

Enchantedlove 1

Thursday 3 July 2014 4:32

To funny

modet 8

Thursday 3 July 2014 6:53

aww. that is tough to hear. sorry

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The Top

Today, after buying my girlfriend an expensive gift for her birthday, cooking her breakfast in bed, and treating her all day ending with dinner and cake at her parents, she burst into tears and said the whole day was ruined. Why? I forgot to buy her a birthday card. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 447

You deserved it 133

Have you watched episode 2 yet? Let us know if you had the same reaction!

I agree, your life sucks 444

You deserved it 165

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to initiate sex with me in my sleep. He confessed to thinking that if he did it lightly enough, I'd think I was just dreaming. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 066

You deserved it 4 508

Today, I was flipping through a magazine and saw an ad that had the line "No corn, no wheat, no soy", all of which I'm severely allergic to. I got so excited at the prospect of having a food I could eat, I fell out of my chair. I then realized it was an ad for dog food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 525

You deserved it 5 575

Today, I was at the sandwich shop I work in. A customer came in and requested an assorted sub. As I finished putting on the sauces, I looked up to see the customer's face set in horror. Apparently I didn't notice that I licked my fingers clean after getting some mayonnaise on them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 033

You deserved it 56 511

Today, I learned from my parents that admitting you're ignoring someone who is trying to give you genuinely helpful advice is not rude, but snapping at said person for ignoring you is in fact very rude. Narcissistic parents at their finest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 733

You deserved it 186