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The all-time greatest FMLs

disataerkatie tells us more.

disataerkatie 6

I wish I had longer arms. Possibly the best part is that he is an entire foot taller than I am...

bsaucedo tells us more.

bsaucedo 0

who says my tank top was low cut and my cleavage was showing ? my shirt doesnt need to be low cut for a bee to fly in. so you deserve to be run over :)

moniescri tells us more.

moniescri 0

guys I wrote this FML... to clear some things up... I was working at a fast food restaurant, not a real restaurant(not fancy and all that). So I was behind the counter and couldn't go out to look at what had happened to the dumb moron that kept asking for napkins. Then my boss came out and told me to go and check, when i went to the table, that lady saw me, took her kid, and RAN theough the door. Then I told my boss what had happened and he told me to go and clean it. SAdly, I couldnt find that moron that did that, but if i ever see her, shes gonna get it! #103-104: jeje :D

Stripes_And_Dots tells us more.

Stripes_And_Dots 5

Firstly, I'm not insane or anything. I have chronic depression and very negative self-esteem. I was talking to her over facebook, so she didn't see me have a flip out. I actually have quite a few friends, but since finishing high school last year everyone is so busy working or at university that we rarely have any time to hang out. I had three friends in high school who I was especially close to and two of them pretty much shut me off. For about a year now every time I've asked them to hang out they've said no, one of the blatantly lies about being busy or tired because she just can't be bothered. The other one, the one I asked, has moved out of home and has been struggling to pay rent and bills, so she's been working lots. I'm so used to hearing them say no, that when she said yes it shocked me and I didn't know how to react - hence triggering the panic attack. Once I'd calmed down I was excited and we're going to have lunch on Monday :)

cremyfrozentreat tells us more.

cremyfrozentreat 11

You're right, I did not plug his nose. I was too busy laughing at the whole situation. He shoved his nose into my boob while he held my nose closed. I don't know how he managed to keep erect with everything.