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As it should

By What have I done? - 16/08/2025 12:00 - Netherlands - Amsterdam

Today, I was so envious of my thin, pretty, genetically perfect sister getting a date that I lied to my mom, saying she was a prostitute. I made a fake escort page and used her pics. My mom lost her shit and kicked my sister out, but now the guilt is eating me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42

You deserved it 1 555

Suspicious minds

By Embarrassed boss - 17/09/2025 09:00

Today, I saw one of my employees sipping from a beer bottle at work. I marched to his desk, snatched the bottle, and said, "Drinking on the job? You're fired. Get out." I then looked at the bottle. It was kombucha. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42

You deserved it 773

Busted

By Busted - 16/01/2026 15:00

Today, my husband planned a surprise party. He would pretend to forget my birthday, I'd leave in a rage and go to my best friend's house, where the surprise party would be. It would have been a great plan had I gone to her house and not my side dick's apartment. Now I'm totally fucked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41

You deserved it 934

Help wanted

By What do I do? - 17/01/2026 09:00

Today, my husband dropped a bombshell when he served me divorce papers and a set of tests proving that our sons (7 and 9 years-old) are not his. I'm alone at home, scared shitless, and my poor kids don't understand where their dad is. I can't take them to their bio dad, since he died four years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40

You deserved it 508

Paparazzo

By Paulalala - 10/09/2025 09:00 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I tried to take a photo of the guy next to me on the bus because he looked like one of the actors in Harry Potter. My flash went off, and the picture was so close-up it looked like I was documenting his acne. He glared at me for the rest of the ride, which was short because I got off at the next stop, nowhere near my destination. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40

You deserved it 555

Stay out of trouble, kids

By Anonymous - 14/04/2025 15:00 - United States - Atlanta

Today, I complimented a woman on her "beautiful pregnancy glow" at the grocery store. She wasn’t pregnant. She was holding a melon. I’ve never backed out of a conversation so fast in my life. Note to self: Don't go grocery shopping after a night of drinking and no sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34

You deserved it 732

Gambling is evil

By mr.DiddyEpsteen - 02/11/2025 15:00

Today, I got off a boring day at work and went to the casino because my wife wanted me to go and it sounded fun. I have been sitting here doing nothing but talk about people's lives in the non-smoking section. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

Hiding

By Anonymous - 04/07/2025 20:00 - United States

Today, I learned just how disgusted I am by my own body, when I was debating whether or not I should wear a baggy hoodie in 92 degree Fahrenheit weather. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

Sharing my journey

By Anonymous - 05/07/2025 00:00 - United States - Healdsburg

Today, my partner has been losing weight to get slimmer and took a picture of the scale. He posted it onto his Facebook and tagged me in it. After two hours we got messages from his family to look in the reflection of the glass on the scale and I was nude in the background. Thanks, Hun! FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

Trapped

By Anonymous - 05/07/2025 08:00 - United States

Today, it's been a week since my girl told me she's pregnant and I fled town in a panic. I realized how badly I fucked up and called her, begging to come back. When I showed up at her house, her brothers kicked my ass and threw me in the street, promising to wring me dry for child support. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

Freakout

By Anonymous - 05/07/2025 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I learned my wife has an extra level of anger. First is sarcasm, then yelling, then the silent treatment, it’s been that way for our whole marriage. Turns out the level above that is hurling a sledgehammer at me. She still won’t tell me what I did to surpass the silent treatment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

One step at a time

By shengming - 06/07/2025 04:00 - China

Today, I was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. Although I am very happy in a sense and feel that there is finally an explanation for the past, this issue is not conducive to my adjustment to society. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

Gooners rise up

By Meanwhile we barely ever fuck - 05/07/2025 17:00 - United States

Today, my boyfriend left his laptop open, signed into a chat program. I learned why he started working out and eating right. Not to look good for me or be healthier. No, he planned his entire diet and exercise plan so he could shoot the biggest loads possible during "goon sessions." FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

His little lipstick

By poopface82 - 06/07/2025 02:00 - United States

Today, I was exhausted after three solid weeks of having my kids. After I got home, my dog decided to get intimate with his stuffed animal toy. I now know what my dog’s dong looks like, and that he’s gotten more action in the last two months than I have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

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The Top

Today, my girlfriend demanded that I delete all my female contacts or she’d set my stuff on fire. Yes, that includes my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 113

You deserved it 263

Today, I got a text from a woman containing many naked pictures of her. Apparently she meant to send those to her boyfriend whose number is one digit from mine. The bad part? My girlfriend was using my phone when I received that message. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 702

You deserved it 2 996

Today, while waiting at the bus stop, the guy standing near me started peeing on the sidewalk and on my shoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 151

You deserved it 2 507

Today, I discovered the hard way that training in martial arts means nothing when the thug harassing your wife at the bar has a mate stood behind you ready, willing, and able to kick you square in the balls with a toe-capped work boot while you’re getting into your correct fighting stance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 645

You deserved it 367

Today, my dog was run over. The man who ran over my dog was taking his own dog to the emergency vet. As the man awkwardly tried to apologise to me, he said, "Think of the irony". FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 895

You deserved it 1 992

Today, I made it all the way up the stairs without collecting up all the shit my wife had left there during the morning. Instead of rewarding me for not falling over it, she cursed me for not understanding her puzzling redistribution system. FML

I agree, your life sucks 783

You deserved it 264