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Target goals

By Anonymous - 17/03/2026 15:00

Today, I officially completed my weight loss journey, only for my wife, who'd previously threatened to divorce me if I didn't lose weight, to tell me that she realized she liked me better when I was fat and that "you don't know what you have until it's gone." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48

You deserved it 7

Lookalike

By Anonymous - 17/03/2026 12:00

Spicy

Today, I finally got with the hot guy from work. We were laying in bed, smiling at each other afterwards, when his eyes traveled down my body and he blurts out, "THAT'S who you look like! Have you ever seen Moana? Yeah, you look JUST like THAT MAUI GUY! WOW!" I'm a woman. A 5ft4 woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39

You deserved it 16

Masterful gambit

By what just happened - 13/03/2026 22:00

Today, a cute guy asked me out for coffee. I like him but didn't want it to be easy, so I said, "Coffee dates are for broke bums, aim a little higher." He said, "Aight I will, peace out" and walked off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31

You deserved it 1 268

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Today, my mother told me she thinks it is time for me to move into my own place. I agreed with her and went to look at studios/flats online. She later came into my room, saw me looking at places and then got pissed off at me, saying that I hate her for wanting to leave her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 301

You deserved it 700

Today, after years of being too self-conscious to do anything big with my appearance, I finally got an undercut. My best friend went on a rant about how I "ruined" how I look and now she can't be seen with me, because we "look mismatched together." Looks like I'm back to being self-conscious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 966

You deserved it 142

Today, my parents called me to ask if I could drop my dog off to them on Sunday. They're having a Superbowl party and want to show her off to their guests. My dog is invited, but I'm not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 281

You deserved it 1 759

Today, my daughter admitted to me that the only reason she's nice to me is because I give her money. She's six. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 259

You deserved it 5 366

Today, my sister and I got into an argument at a tennis court which ended up with her trying to run me over in the parking lot. I stepped to the side and hit her door, denting it. My parents expect me to pay for the damage caused by my sister trying to kill me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 886

You deserved it 3 558

Today, I realised there's a reason that no one talks to the weird guy from choir practice. I was nice to him a couple weeks ago and now he won't stop following me around the school and watching my group at lunch from behind a pole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 474

You deserved it 2 053