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OP here. I am glad that a lot of people understood that it had been meant as a gift with no strings attached, only to have then attached later as a reward for performance. My dad never specified, "This is what you get for doing well." It was, "I had a great day and I want to share it with everyone." The truth is, if he had said he was disappointed in me but felt I should keep the $50 and hoped I would do all I can to improve, I would have respected him and listened to him. It's not about the money. It could have been $5 and I would have reacted the same way. I now understand that gifts are conditional and I have to continually earn every favorable reaction from him, on the off chance he intends to give one.

You got what you wanted

By Anonymous - 19/08/2014 18:16 - United States - Glendale

Today, I told my husband that I'm jealous of all the other girls whose husbands always take pictures of them together and post them online. He responded by posting a picture of himself, with me on the toilet in the background, captioned, "The bitch on the pot." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 154

You deserved it 19 064

Stalking

By Idiot32 - 25/05/2019 02:00

Today, I saw my dad driving our red Dakota, and I thought it would be funny to tail him around town. It wasn't until I saw cop lights flashing in my rear-view mirror that I remembered that we'd given away our red truck. I'd scared an old lady so badly that she called the police. FML

I agree, your life sucks 697

You deserved it 2 735

Anger issues much?

By justhatelife - 09/12/2016 14:49 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, my coworker got angry at a mean customer. She came to the back where I work and started punching the wall repeatedly. When I tried to intervene and stop her from breaking her hand, she punched me in the stomach and uppercut me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 350

You deserved it 1 334

By Anonymous - 09/10/2015 06:39 - United States - Flagstaff

Today, at age 27, I went to pick up the girl I like for my first ever date. Her brother answered the door with a baseball bat, said the date was off and threatened to smash my kneecaps to pieces if I ever came back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 300

You deserved it 1 901

By whoops - 01/08/2014 20:45 - United States - Vincennes

Today, my girlfriend's dad returned home from deployment. Being the grade A fucktard that I am, I got flustered and asked, "So um, did you make it back?" He looked me dead in the eyes and said completely deadpan, "No, obviously I died. Moron." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 366

You deserved it 25 991

The more you know

By Jeff - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, I found out that women have another hole that they pee out of. I'm 37. FML

I agree, your life sucks 762

You deserved it 3 528

By Anonymous - 27/09/2015 07:10 - United States - Queens Village

Today, while singing Happy Birthday to my husband, I desperately needed to fart. I couldn't leave the room, so I let it out real slow. There were over 20 of us there, yet somehow my mother-in-law knew it was me. She went over to the window and opened it wide, all while glaring at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 161

You deserved it 4 070

By BooBabe - 04/06/2012 23:50 - United States - Denver

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me in a restaurant in front of a lot of people. Once I said yes, some guy yelled out, "SEX. SEX. SEX." My boyfriend yelled back, "LATER!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 041

You deserved it 6 835

By meghancuma - 22/09/2015 17:25 - United States - Springfield

Today, I got fired from my nannying job because one of the mom's several boyfriends mentioned that he found me attractive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 818

You deserved it 1 576

meghancuma tells us more.

meghancuma 14

Wednesday 23 September 2015 3:16

OP here, her kids were the best. That's the worst part of losing the job.

By SwoopingEagle - 09/06/2017 20:00

Today, my co-workers were laughing at me because I couldn't throw paper into the bin, regardless of how close I was. Annoyed, I tried to prove then wrong by angry throwing paper into the bin that was no less that 1 cm away from me. I missed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 845

You deserved it 1 323

Travelling light

By Earl_KarmasBitch - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - China - Kunming

Today, I went hiking in China. I knew I was unfit, I didn't know I was "being overtaken by an old lady leading a donkey" unfit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 219

You deserved it 2 030

Earl_KarmasBitch tells us more.

Earl_KarmasBitch 34

Sunday 13 November 2016 18:20

OP here. I wasn't expecting this to get published. The longer version of the story is that with a couple of friends I decided to go on a hike through Tiger Leaping Gorge on the banks of the Yangtze River. One of the big problems with the hike is the altitude. Much of the hike is at around 2km above sea level. Basically, after around 4 hours of hiking almost continuously uphill I was pretty tired. One friend was also tired and took an offer to get a donkey ride to the top of the 28 bends (the most notoriously difficult part of the whole 2-day hike). The woman who owned the donkey wasn't actually that old, probably early 50's (I'm 40ish) and works taking travellers to the top of the bends. I was tempted to also get a donkey but elected to instead give my backpack to my friend on the donkey and try to race him up the slope on foot. The two of us actually hiking the bends set off while the woman who owned the donkey saddled it. I actually felt pretty good that it was only at the 16th bend that she managed to catch up with us. That was until I noticed that she'd decided that my bag was too heavy for the donkey and she was carrying it herself! But in the end I did complete the entire hike. Got some amazing photos and really enjoyed myself. Probably got a bit fitter too.