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It sucks, but it was an accident, I didn't slam on brakes or anything but it was at the bottom of a little hill, and the van she was driving was much heavier and harder to stop than the mustang she is used to that will stop on a dime.

By Sunny - 18/09/2013 22:59 - Canada - Ottawa

Today, every time I write the word "analyst," I can't help but giggle because it begins with "anal." I'm 24, and studying to be a conflict analyst. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 527

You deserved it 34 149

By Pancakegirl - 18/06/2009 00:24 - United States

Today, I was hanging out with a friend at IHOP. When I left, a middle aged man in the parking lot offered me $100 to sleep with him in the dumpsters behind the building. That is the first time I've been hit on in months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 868

You deserved it 4 059

By Anonymous - 02/12/2010 00:36 - United States

Today, my fencing team took pictures for the yearbook. We were having individual pictures with our weapons, and it was my turn. When the photographer told me to pose, I tried to be super cool by quickly putting my sabre against my chest like some sort of soldier. I poked myself in the eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 552

You deserved it 35 909

By Jessi - 24/07/2012 18:33 - Canada - Mississauga

Today, I finally got to see my boyfriend, after two months apart. As we hugged, he lifted me up and spun me around like in the movies. It would have been really romantic if I hadn't hit a little boy while he was riding past on his bike. I've just traumatized a little kid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 414

You deserved it 3 102

10 out of 10 for originality

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my neighbor declared his love for me via "the medium of interpretative dance." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 354

You deserved it 3 337

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Today, I realized the person I had been habitually stealing bag lunches from at work made me a canned dog food sandwich. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 468

You deserved it 405 066

Today, I was told to "stop being such a little pussy." Why? Because my body chose to pass out from the heat. I didn’t complain even once, but I drank plenty of water and still passed out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 768

You deserved it 130

Today, I was talking on the phone with my crush. After an hour of talking she told me, "If you were half as hot as you sound over the phone, I'd date you immediately." Maybe I should give up on love and start a phone sex line. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 363

You deserved it 2 716

Today, I was given new meds, and apparently my body doesn't understand the difference between "may cause stomach upset" and "you will crap yourself as you have an orgasm while having sex with your boyfriend." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 177

You deserved it 5 486

Today, I ran to hug my mom at the airport, but when I stepped back, I realized I was hugging a total stranger who just so happened to be wearing the same coat as her usual coat. She smiled awkwardly as I backed away and said, “Sorry, I thought you were my mom.” The next level of embarrassment came when I looked up and saw my actual mom staring at me in horror from a few feet away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 207

You deserved it 434

Today, I had to delay the Father's Day dinner that I had to cook, so it wouldn't conflict with my wife and kids' gaming schedules. FML

I agree, your life sucks 992

You deserved it 137