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I'm the person who posted this. I just forgot to log in. Anyway, I DID kick him in his deku nuts and walk out on him. Thanks for all your hilarious comments guys. :)

By brookenicolee29 - 26/01/2014 22:06 - United States - Clinton

Today, I was reading FML's birthday blog post and saw a picture of myself in it. I would've been happy if it wasn't #4 in the list of worst duckfaces of the week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 248

You deserved it 55 185

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brookenicolee29 27

Monday 27 January 2014 1:50

I changed my picture because o it(: And it was more of a kissy face.. Haha

By n1a1t1h1a1n1 - 11/12/2012 07:15 - United States - San Francisco

Today, on the bus, when I was asking my 6-year-old son what he wanted for Christmas, a stranger came up to us and yelled at him about how Santa Claus is not real, that his "parents are fucking liars" and that he should "never listen to anything one of those fuckers says." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 535

You deserved it 3 406

By friedbutter - 28/10/2012 14:53 - Canada - Pickering

Today, my husband thought it would be funny to tell my 10-year-old son that if he wanted to get girls, he had to do the Gangnam Style. My son has now non-stop been doing the Gangnam Style. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 049

You deserved it 4 624

By Shoes - 12/06/2009 05:33 - United States

Today, I was helping an old man find a pair of shoes. I told him about a particularly comfortable pair but had to inform him that they only came in black or white. Hearing this, the old man grabbed me around the neck and began to beat me in the head with our display shoe. He wanted brown. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 175

You deserved it 4 236

By countrygirl0118 - 17/12/2009 22:30 - United States

Today, my boyfriend's mother called me. She assumed that I bought him a PS3 for Christmas, and she and the rest of his family have only purchased him games to go with it. The thing is, I already got him an expensive gift. Now, I have to scramble to come up with the money to get this for him instead, and save the coat I bought for his birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 006

You deserved it 5 107

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countrygirl0118 6

Friday 18 December 2009 16:11

HI AGAIN I'M THE OP! first off the coat is nonrefundable, and I got him it because we do live in a harsh area and he has to walk to work wearing a million sweatshirts at the moment. second, no he doesn't live with his folks, we live together so in a way it would be for me too but i thought the coat had a more pressing need. third, i had discussed with his sister and his brother in-law that no, i was not getting him a PS3 until his birthday because blistering cold takes precedence over playing games. AND i had said if you really want to get him a game that's fine, but he won't be able to use it til February. THEN his mother called me, and told me about them all buying him games. I said to her on the phone, "I've already bought him a nice coat and was waiting til his birthday for the game system." She then said, "Oh, well I knew that, but we knew you'd probably want to get him the system too since we've all bought him games." One game is okay, but everyone buying him a game makes it look ridiculous and then he'll have all these games and not be able to use them for 2 months. ALSO i don't want to fight with his mother. This is the first Christmas I'm spending with them and on top of it his dad has bone marrow cancer and lymphoma and has chosen to stop his chemotherapy treatments, so this may be the last Christmas they all have as a family. So I'm not going to cause a fight. FINALLY, all you who commented calling me spineless, maybe you should learn to reserve comments like that considering that sometimes you cannot fit all of the story into the text space provided. But I guess your bad behavior must be a product of your upbringing. Very poor manners. Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays.

It's a coup!

By everythingWASperfect - 13/11/2010 14:43 - Canada

Today, at work, I accidentally walked into a meeting at which the whole company was there but me. The meeting was about how they could legally fire me while paying as little severance as possible. I'm the CEO and the founder of the company. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 320

You deserved it 4 394

Sebummer

By ewwww - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I discovered that an unmentioned side effect of my new medication is body zits. I now have zits on my neck, my ear, and inside my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 883

You deserved it 3 465

By MrZhang - 23/06/2009 03:34 - Australia

Today, I had an interview with IBM. For a week I did extensive research and preparation for the interview. At first the interview was going really well. I was hitting all the marks. Then just as a final casual question she asked with a smile "What does IBM stand for?". I didn't know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 428

You deserved it 26 538

By Anonymous - 31/07/2013 16:49 - United States - Pleasanton

Today, I found out that when I text my boyfriend, he isn't the one to read them. Instead, he pays his friend to "keep the bitch busy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 021

You deserved it 7 001

By I_Hate_Cars - 15/04/2009 14:10 - United States

Today, I went for a jog. I had stopped at an intersection to let a car go by. The car stopped and the driver waved me on, so I started jogging again. After a few steps, I feel a sharp pain in my side, then wake up in the hospital. The driver 'accidentally' hit the gas. FML

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You deserved it 5 854

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I_Hate_Cars 0

Thursday 16 April 2009 7:11

To all, thanks for your concern. Don't worry, I'm fine, it was just a bad concussion when I hit the ground that knocked me out. I hope I don't disappoint anybody, but I am not going to sue. A few years in jail ought to be enough for the driver- it was a drunk. Luckily, there was a black and white across the street and got the driver in time. Again, thank you all for your concerns.