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Your instinct was right, because it’s good to laugh life off. Follow the instructions below, and if your story gets through the moderation process, it'll published in the next 24 hours or so.


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    Your story must start with “Today,” and end with “FML”. TXT language is forbidden and spelling mistakes hurt people’s eyeballs, so the use of either would result in the direct dismissal of your FML. Don’t use this space for discussions, advertising or spam, or for posting anything which isn’t an FML. Furthermore, it’s not possible to obtain badges by posting keywords, so stop believing things you’ve read on message boards. Don’t try reposting old FMLs, we’re not that daft.


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    When you brag a bit too much

    By Lewis - 11/12/2018 00:30

    do not count your chickens before they hatch
    I agree, your life sucks 231
    You deserved it 155
    Share  
    St. Patrick's Day: Shamrocks and Tribulations
    Green anecdotes of jealousy, full of shamrocks and pints, for a memorable St. Patrick's Day! More…
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    Top comments

    Phillycheeze 20
    Tuesday 11 December 2018 1:29

    Run Forest...Run!

    1 0

    Comments

    Phillycheeze 20
    Tuesday 11 December 2018 1:29

    Run Forest...Run!

    1 0
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    Today, and every night all summer, I can hear the kids outside playing when I go to bed. They’re so loud, it makes it hard to sleep. The kids have a later bedtime than I do, and I’m 33. I'm feeling like a broken down old lady. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 1 309
    You deserved it 277
    Today, to cheer my girlfriend up after her mother died a week ago, I took her to a comedy club. The comedian's theme for the night happened to be mother-daughter relationships. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 62 745
    You deserved it 8 006
    Today, my husband picked a fight with me because I have more pictures of our child on my desk at work than I do of him. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 12 916
    You deserved it 1 465
    Today, my wife got so upset I didn't hold her while Snooki from Jersey Shore was crying, that after the episode was done she locked herself in our room crying. Now I have to sleep on the floor of my living room. Thanks Snooki. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 40 768
    You deserved it 8 418
    Today, I had to admit that I desperately need anti-anxiety medication. Apparently, when you walk around a grocery store avoiding eye contact and generally acting "sketchy", management will call the police on you, who will then pat you down to be sure you aren't shoplifting. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 22 640
    You deserved it 2 559
    Today, I received a package from Amazon. My mum smiled at me when I entered the living room, pointing to my package. She had already opened it and held back her smile. My penis pills for longer endurance just got delivered. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 32 470
    You deserved it 9 960
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