Animals Today, my mother went shopping. She bought three boxes of Popsicles...

FeedMe - 27/05/2011 10:45 - United States

Today, my mother went shopping. She bought three boxes of Popsicles and a giant stuffed dog. She did not buy dinner or toilet paper. I've eaten nothing but cereal and popcorn for three days now. FML

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St. Patrick's Day: Shamrocks and Tribulations
Green anecdotes of jealousy, full of shamrocks and pints, for a memorable St. Patrick's Day! …

Parenting gone feral

hungry - 22/10/2019 04:00 - Canada - Halifax

Today, as I searched for food to take to work for lunch, I noticed that the only recent addition to our fridge is chocolate milk and popsicles. My mom went grocery shopping yesterday. FML

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pathetic - 06/11/2013 13:04 - United States - Lincoln

Today, my grocery shopping consisted of Poptarts, SpaghettiOs, Lucky Charms, Popsicles, Easy Mac, and Twinkies. I'm a 25-year-old woman with no kids. FML

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The long con

Anonymous - 25/09/2020 23:01 - United States - San Bernardino

Today, I had expired soda and stale chips for my dinner. Why? Because my mother spent all our grocery money on organic food for her chihuahua. FML

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CaityLovesBo - 05/02/2012 18:49 - United States

Today, my mom went to the store. She said she was feeling generous, and had gotten everyone a little treat. My brothers each got candy and a movie. I got acne medication. FML

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I like what I like

Aled - - United Kingdom

Today, I caught my mom eating cat biscuits. We don't have a cat. FML

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Anonymous - 23/02/2011 16:04 - United States

Today, I had to spend all of my money on textbooks even though my refrigerator is empty. Starving and frustrated, I called home to ask for money for groceries. My mom told me I could afford to skip a few meals. FML

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anonymous - 08/10/2011 20:40 - United States

Today, to keep me from "getting fatter", my roommate raided the kitchen. She ate everything from cookies and ice cream to deli meat. The only thing left in the house are vegetables. FML

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All in the Family

weedvocate - 25/03/2020 14:02

Today, my mother brought home dinner for four people. I was not one of those people. The dog, however, was. FML

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Off script

Going hungry - 28/07/2024 17:00 - United States

Today, my fiancee asked me to text her a grocery list. I asked for meat, fruit, vegetables, you know, the staples. She came back with tons of sugar cereal, pop tarts, cookie dough, and other unhealthy crap. We have no other food, our monthly budget is gone, and junk food gives me horrible stomach cramps. FML

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Uncomfortable

Jules - 09/12/2020 08:02 - Germany - Norden

Today, while many women have a wardrobe full of nothing-to-wear, my mom has a fridge full of nothing-to-eat and a living room full of nowhere-to-sit. FML

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DReamBig24 0

Friday 27 May 2011 15:57

get money from her and buy food for YOU

iAmScrubs 19

Friday 27 May 2011 15:58

At least you have a stuffed dog to stroke and calm you down

mrf07960 0

Friday 3 June 2011 13:27

get ur own food all u need is money!

bloodycherries_fml 3

Saturday 18 June 2011 19:03

fail mom fyl

Amethyst99 2

Tuesday 12 July 2011 22:09

did she buy crack before she bought u popsicles and a stuffed dog??

alinka_fml 0

Tuesday 16 August 2011 16:36

well stop complaining, get your lazy ass up and buy your own groceries.

MeleMallory 0

Sunday 21 August 2011 14:04

you can't do your own shopping?

TrIIckShot 2

Thursday 25 August 2011 7:32

Oh think of a nice, sweet juicy hamburger..All of that tender meat and all of its taste, running through your mouth...Now who's hungry?

abrownboy15 1

Saturday 15 October 2011 2:18

I fail too see the problem here..

rkongesor 2

Tuesday 3 January 2012 5:36

My mom is morbidly obese. That's her idea of grocery shopping too. Only good thing about it is I say skinny

fogrunner 13

Thursday 19 January 2012 6:17

Call social services...

BB14_fml 0

Sunday 5 February 2012 6:40

Is she on drugs or something? Jeez.

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I learned what live maggots in chocolate cake taste like. FML

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Today, I finally did the splits for the first time in my life! Unfortunately, it happened when I stepped in wet dog poop on my kitchen floor. One foot slipped forward in it, and I fell right on top of it. FML

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Today, I wore a sleeveless shirt for the first time in years, when I glimpsed something on my shoulder that looked like a spider. I let out a scream that sounded like a donkey having a stroke, and flailed my arms. Then I realized it was my tattoo, and that I was freaking out everyone on the bus. FML

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Today, around 12 a.m., my pet parrot said a sentence I've never heard him say before. Usually this would be exciting, but considering he said, 'I killed the bird', and that one of my two love birds mysteriously died a few days ago, it's safe to say I'm now terrified. FML

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Today, I went shopping with my two-year-old nephew. He threw a tantrum in the middle of the store because I would not show him my "boobies". A man came up to us and said I should do what my nephew wanted. FML

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Today, my boyfriend was talking with his friends about how long girls take to get ready (hair, make-up, etc.). I said, "I never spend a long time getting ready." He then looked at me and said, "Maybe you should." FML

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