Love, Awkward, Religion and Grandparents: Today, my grandmother gave me rosary beads for my birthday. She...

By kdgirl - this FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my grandmother gave me rosary beads for my birthday. She told me I'd better start praying for a husband. FML

agreeclassic 29 878

vote type 1 3 229

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

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Similar FMLs

Thanks, I feel better!

By anon - this FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Port Saint Lucie

Today, I told my grandma my boyfriend had cheated on me. She told me that it was my fault for not straightening my hair, and for gaining a few pounds. FML

agreeclassic 26 995

vote type 1 3 046

You must conform

By Anonymous - this FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - Germany - Titisee-neustadt

Today, I'm the only grandchild who regularly visits, calls, and runs errands for my grandparents, even though I live two hours away. I'm also their biggest disappointment because I'm not married. FML

agreeclassic 23 560

vote type 1 1 709

Miracles

By smyp - this FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Lithuania

Today, my wife and I decided to celebrate Christmas Eve with her side of the family. When we arrived at her parents' house, I heard her mother say that Christmas miracles don't exist since my wife brought me along. FML

agreeclassic 23 778

vote type 1 1 696

By in this day and age.... - 19/10/2023 16:25 - United States - Dallas

Today, the first words I heard from my "good, Christian" future mother-in-law included a salvo of curse words and a hushed rant about "them dirty Jews". I'm culturally Jewish. This bodes well. FML

agreeclassic 21 196

vote type 1 1 826

You snooze, you lose

By propose_you_freakin_coward - this FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Singapore - Singapore

Today, I was insulted and harassed by my sister and her boyfriend, all because I proposed yesterday. They were angry I might get married before they did. They have known each other since primary school; I met my fiancée earlier this year. FML

agreeclassic 47 941

vote type 1 6 861

Self defence

By Anonymous - this FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I went to my grandmother's house to pick up her cat to take him to the vet. She forgot who I was and sprayed me in the face with pepper spray. FML

agreeclassic 38 129

vote type 1 2 487

By oh why... - 20/12/2013 14:51 - United States

Today, I got a ransom note saying, "We have kidnapped your husband and won't release him unless you postpone the wedding." The wedding is tomorrow and it was in his handwriting. FML

agreeclassic 55 473

vote type 1 4 495

Treat yourself

By birthday bash - this FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - France

Today, it was my girlfriend's birthday. She decided that her "gift to herself" would be to leave the loser who has been holding her back for two years. Hello, my name is Ben, and I'm that loser. FML

agreeclassic 34 226

vote type 1 5 248

Hungover

By RedheadA - this FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my husband and I woke up to see my drunk mother passed out on our couch. She was wearing nothing but socks. FML

agreeclassic 38 670

vote type 1 3 698

By kb - 18/11/2013 06:38 - United States

Today, my mother gave me a bottle of stool softeners as a gift at my baby shower. FML

agreeclassic 36 691

vote type 1 4 055

bluecat_fml 0

Tuesday 21 September 2010 9:12

grandma humor, never gets old :P

aardvarkish 16

Tuesday 21 September 2010 12:25

I think I would have said, "Don't worry. My boyfriend promised to leave his wife, stop selling drugs, and then marry me."

Comments

Quagmire_ladies 9

Tuesday 21 September 2010 14:44

lmfao!! good one

RedPillSucks 31

Tuesday 21 September 2010 14:47

Silly girl, those aren't rosary beads, they're benwa balls. Your grandma was always a bit on the kinky side.

triggerit 5

Tuesday 21 September 2010 15:33

granny did not want you to be **** all your life...it is time to find a noble husband...

S3xualyAttractiv 0

Tuesday 21 September 2010 15:50

...I would demolish the cake on her head :)

S3xualyAttractiv 0

Tuesday 21 September 2010 15:52

red bull doesn't give you wings STUPID!

Girreth 7

Tuesday 21 September 2010 15:54

12 u suck u so dum fk of ur gay lrn 2 typ srs u fkk sux lol

britasif27 5

Tuesday 21 September 2010 16:31

is that a sign? lol

far_east 6

Tuesday 21 September 2010 19:16

grandmas and monopoly :P

swimmykimi 0

Tuesday 21 September 2010 22:05

Aww burn FYL

loso86 2

Tuesday 21 September 2010 22:15

epic win

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Today, my boss asked me if I needed to stand in the corner while I thought about what I did wrong. FML

agreeclassic 18 574

vote type 1 2 798

Today, my roommate still chooses to waste his money on McDonald's food for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. He politely refuses to eat my nutritious home-cooked meals that people say taste amazing. Then he complains that he's in a shitty mood all the time. I wonder why… FML

agreeclassic 927

vote type 1 550

Today, I was on a first date and tried to crack a joke by saying, “Don’t worry, I’m not a serial killer.” My date replied, completely serious, “That’s exactly what a serial killer would say.” The rest of the date was eaten in awkward silence and vague small talk. I'm not going back into the dating pool ever again. FML

agreeclassic 68

vote type 1 182

Today, I was working as an intern at a day care. One of the kids touched my chest a couple of times, and I jokingly told him that he shouldn't touch old and ugly women like me. So he started groping the little girls instead. When the other teachers asked him why, he said I had told him to. FML

agreeclassic 35 437

vote type 1 12 979

Today, it's been almost a week since I returned from my vacation to Ireland. Before I rarely drank. Now I'm pretty sure I'm an alcoholic. You might think I'm joking, but I've woken up hungover every day since I landed there. I basically paid to kill my liver and become AA's next poster child. FML

agreeclassic 31 370

vote type 1 17 617

Today, I woke up to the sound of something hitting my bedroom wall outside. I could see my boyfriend's car from the window, so I assumed he was throwing pebbles to get my attention. I opened the window and an egg flew in. FML

agreeclassic 34 569

vote type 1 4 556