Intimacy: Today, I wanted to surprise my boyfriend by dressing up in sexy...

By lollipopp56 - 26/03/2009 06:09 - Canada

Today, I wanted to surprise my boyfriend by dressing up in sexy lingerie. When I went to answer the door he was standing there with a shocked expression, his friends parked in the driveway had the same expression as well. He came to break up with me. He told me after we had sex. FML

agreeclassic 149 440

vote type 1 13 821

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By Anonymous - 08/03/2015 10:33 - United Kingdom - The Hyde

Today, I decided to put on some sexy lingerie and wait for my husband to come home to surprise him. He took one look at me and immediately accused me of cheating. He was convinced my explanation was a lie and that I'd rushed some guy out the back door when he came home. FML

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By perfectmoment - 10/10/2009 22:22 - Canada

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By anonymous - 17/03/2015 05:09 - United States - Spokane

Today, I tried to surprise my husband by wearing something sexy to bed. He didn't say anything, just laughed and left the room for 10 minutes. The little confidence I had disappeared, so I changed, feeling stupid for thinking I could pull off sexy. He got mad at me for being confusing. FML

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By nnnaaazzz - 24/10/2009 12:20 - United Kingdom

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By Desertdryspell - 20/12/2018 14:00

Today, I dressed up in new lingerie I had bought to surprise my partner. He said "what do you want? Just go to bed instead". So much for that new confidence. FML.

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By notsohot - 25/08/2019 00:01

Today, I showed up at my boyfriend's house with nothing under my coat but some sexy lingerie. He told me he was working on an assignment, and made me wait three hours before he'd have sex with me. FML

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By boyfriendisatoss - 26/12/2009 07:22 - Australia

Today, I had two surprises for my boyfriend who was at work. One was a dessert and the other was sexy lingerie. He chose the dessert. Then told me I was an idiot. FML

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Classic

By Singleagain - 10/01/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, when I came home, my girlfriend was in sexy lingerie, and said it was a surprise for me. Sounds awesome, right? Too bad she was drenched in sweat and the room smelled like sex. I looked in the closet, only to get punched in the face by a naked guy. FML

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Off the top of my head…

By helplesslover - 04/10/2009 06:13 - United States

Today, my boyfriend called and said he was stopping by to talk. I didn't understand why he would stop by, so I asked if he was going to break up with me, he said no. Half an hour later, he knocked on my door to break up with me. FML

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Expectations

By Anonymous - 02/01/2022 05:01 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I are on vacation. He was watching TV, and I thought I’d try to be sexy, so I walked in wearing lingerie. He smiled at me and said, “What the hell are you wearing?” FML

agreeclassic 1 558

vote type 1 227

Tucatz 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 16:53

And in the meantime his friends hung out in the driveway, right? Pure class that is. Be glad the jackass is gone.

Bubs_fml 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 16:53

Sounds like he deserves a Falcon Punch.

Comments

synnerr 0

Friday 27 March 2009 17:30

Rofl, I don't know why having sex while his friends were there is a big deal? If they're mature it's not an issue. Lol... Still funny. And #1 that's ****** up.

voice_of_reason 0

Friday 27 March 2009 20:05

If he had told you first, I bet you still woulda ******. Wouldn't you?

theoldGP 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 0:58

wow he brought his friends with him, hahaha wow.

FML_CS 0

Sunday 29 March 2009 6:36

Hope you punched him in the balls. xP

sammop21 0

Sunday 29 March 2009 16:28

Explain the sex in detail, please. XD

Cobragt932000 0

Sunday 29 March 2009 21:56

#29 I agree.. Girl you should make the call a really mess with him. If nothing else to back up the famed. Hell hath no furry like a scorn woman.

Cobragt932000 0

Sunday 29 March 2009 21:59

maiden_girl 5

Monday 30 March 2009 2:44

So what, his friends waited outside while you two had sex then he told you it was over? What a douche for one for wanting to break up with you in front of an audience and 2) you having sex with him while his friends waited outside.

dead14eternity 0

Monday 30 March 2009 6:13

what a ******* dick, didn't have the decency to decline if he was planning to break up.

SoFaded80 0

Monday 30 March 2009 7:14

now im not sure but im pretty sure he didnt have sex w/the OP right then i think he did like days or watev before and then came over to break up...y would his friends wait around in the driveway otherwise