Thanks, I hate it! By AtikaSucks - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - Tunisia Today, thanks to my brilliant hairstylist, I ended up with a brand new haircut, which I like to call the "Bowler hat-and-Spaghetti" cut. FML I agree, your life sucks 24 679 You deserved it 3 313 Share Tweet Share
Today, my new boyfriend and I got intimate for the first time. He started whispering in my ear, but I couldn't understand him. He pushed me away and ignored me the rest of the night. Apparently it's a huge turn-off that I can't talk dirty in Klingon. FML I agree, your life sucks 49 306 You deserved it 6 057
Today, I had to go to a birthday party for 10 year-old triplets. They've all been dead for more than 9 years. FML I agree, your life sucks 46 740 You deserved it 6 744
Today, one of my 5-year-old son's teeth fell out, but he's quite scatterbrained and he lost it. He did however find my vibrating duck under my pillow, and is now crying because he thinks that I stole his tooth so that the tooth fairy would bring me a toy. FML I agree, your life sucks 512 You deserved it 86
Today, I'm insanely hungover from a long night of drinking. I'm going to my nephew's baptism in an hour as his godmother. FML I agree, your life sucks 8 206 You deserved it 55 402
Today, I woke up with the worst cold, ever. My nose was running like crazy and my eyes were all puffy. So I stumbled over to the medicine cabinet and took what I thought were three tylenol cold's. Two hours later I'm still sick and I can't leave the bathroom. They were laxatives. FML I agree, your life sucks 44 441 You deserved it 25 981
Today, I was having a beautiful lucid dream when a telemarketer called at 5AM, waking me up. I silenced my phone and went back to sleep, and was somehow able to resume my lucid dream. Then my phone vibrated me awake. It was the same telemarketer, this time calling at 7AM. FML I agree, your life sucks 3 283 You deserved it 281
Today, I woke up to a note from my wife, saying that since I spent Father's Day golfing, she booked herself a spa day, so I could take care of our 4 kids and the house like she does every day. She ignored every single one of my calls and didn't even tell me what spa she went to. What mother does that to her family? FML I agree, your life sucks 108 You deserved it 1 578
if it's any consolation, I love spaghetti
your hair will grow back lolz!! so grow some hair and some balls.... but not ball hair