Bananarama By wtfisthisworldcomingto - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff Today, I was mugged. The guy mugging me was eating a banana. FML I agree, your life sucks 37 882 You deserved it 7 510 Share Tweet Share
Today, my son broke his arm roughhousing with his brother on a bunk bed. While at the ER, he thought it would be funny to tell a different story to each doctor and nurse, forcing me to speak over him. They found this behavior "suspicious" and reported us to child services. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 210 You deserved it 168
Today, my boss told me I got my new job because she rejected candidates that seemed "too confident" or "too pretty." FML I agree, your life sucks 31 489 You deserved it 3 038
Today, my friend and I took an online quiz to find out what character from Lord of the Rings we look like. She got Arwen. I got Gollum. FML I agree, your life sucks 738 You deserved it 242
Today, my professor gave me a huge lecture in front of the class about showing up sick, about how I was endangering the lives of other students, and kicked me out of class. As I left, everyone applauded. I'm not sick, but suffering for horrible allergies. FML I agree, your life sucks 2 012 You deserved it 223
Today, I went into my dad’s phone out of suspicion and read his texts. Instant regret. He’s 65, goes to various prostitutes, mum’s oblivious, they’re happy and take care of each other. This one’s a weird one to suppress or learn to let go. FML I agree, your life sucks 476 You deserved it 1 561
Today, I was cleaning off my couch so my nephew could crash here for a few nights. It's been so long since we've sat on it that it is now inhabited by rats we didn't know were in the house, including newly-born ones. FML I agree, your life sucks 7 623 You deserved it 6 566
did he stab you with the banana?
That's important information. Tell the cops to search for banana breath.